Here to There:

Who Said Women Have to Shave their Armpits & Legs? (Part 1)

2011-12-26T08:02:00.002-05:00

I have asked this question many times and I was never really given an honest, factual answer as to why. Many of the famous, common answers I receive were:

"Women are supposed to have flawless legs and underarms."
"It's not hygienic to have hair on those parts."
"It's a turn-off to guys!"

However, these answers never really satisfied me. If women were "supposed to" have flawless legs and underarms, then why did God put them there in the first place? Did God make a mistake when He created these hairs to be on our armpits and legs?

Then the question of hygiene was brought up. It is "unclean" to have those parts unshaved. Well, if it is, then men should shave their legs and armpits as well. Right? I mean, as far as I know, both men and women should practice good hygiene. So, why do men get away with not shaving their legs and underarms?

The third answer just gives me a practical application of "and thy desire shall be for thy husband" pronouncement on Eve. Women do stuff to attract, please, and satisfy the opposite gender, and if it means they have to shave their legs and underarms almost everyday, then bring on the razor!

One teenage blogger summarizes all these three points:

"In high school, not shaving is the new leprosy. I recently made the choice to stop shaving my leg and armpit hair...However, all I received was negative comments, except for one of my friends who is okay with. I was repeatedly told it was gross and unnatural. And one person even told me that 'If you want to date a guy, you need to shave. If you want to date a girl, that's okay then...To make matters worse, when I asked why it was okay for men not to shave, but not okay for women, the response I got was 'because they're men.' Even after that, when I said 'but that's sexist,' I was told 'no, it's not.' ...I was hoping my generation would be more understanding, but I guess it's my fault I'm female."

While this girl may be considered unpopular for her decision, she is not alone. American comedienne and actress, Monique Angela Hicks, known professionally as Mo'Nique, takes the brave stand for having au natural legs and Julia Roberts turned heads for turning up at the premiere of the 1999 movie, "Notting Hill," with underarms exposing months of growth.

I will not excuse myself, though. I used to shave my legs, and I still shave my underarms. And I admit that I still feel shame and embarrassment when people look at my legs. One student in one of the medical missionary training schools we held in Magallanes, Cavite told me he will never marry a girl who has leg hair. He looked at my legs, as if on cue, and I happen to be wearing a skirt that exposed a bit of my legs. So I quickly hid them, and he looked away fast. He never talked to me about the subject again.

Hence, the million dollar question still remains, "Who said women have to shave their armpits and legs?"

(Part 1 of 3)

I Must DECREASE!

2011-12-22T17:45:00.000-05:00

Madness. Sheer madness. To travel four days before Christmas in a ship and book for the economy class. Why? According to my recent experience, here's why:

TOO MANY PEOPLE: I cannot really emphasize this much except to say that there's too many people when you feel the air breathing out of their nostrils, and feel the form of their genitalia on your back. Forget personal space.
TOO MANY PEOPLE: Everyone was pushing, shoving fighting for a place. There came a point when everyone was just shouting in exasperation. It was like that one scene in Finding Nemo when a whole "crowd" of fish were trying to get the net down. "Push, push, push, push..." muttered the guys behind me. Crazy lot. It's not like the ship is going anywhere without them. I mean, everyone has a reservation, so there's no need to worry about losing a place. Or so I thought...
JUST TOO MANY PEOPLE: Someone else got my reservation. Yup. And he wouldn't budge. Said he, "Well, you can take the other beds, I was here first." Said I, "I can't take other beds because those are reserved for other people as well." He replied, "Well, you can take those other beds, and they go down at the bottom of the ship to find a place to sleep. Or YOU go down at the bottom of the ship and find a place to sleep, and they take these beds." Man, oh man. There was no one else to ask. The crew assigned to us were scurrying around like headless chickens. I sat in one of the beds for a while, hoping no one would claim ownership. Thankfully, no one did.

Honestly, I was a little scared. But it lasted only a few minutes. Now, I got to hold myself for a whole day. No peeing, no leaving the bed. Everyone has already warned me not to leave my bags unattended, and there are several people already reporting of stolen valuables. If I was in a cabin, it would have been better, but this is the best I can get since I booked it late...

In retrospect, however, Jesus chose to be born in a manger. Way too low than an economy class with a room full of 250 plus people. Jesus had animals with Him since there was no room in any inn. That is sheer madness. Jesus was mad to have chosen to be born in a lowly stable...Jesus was MADly in love with you and me! I realize the base selfishness of people because as we scrammed around, fighting for a place, Jesus chose to lose His place, to go to the lowest position.

"O love, how deep, how broad, how high

Beyond all though and fantasy,

That God, the son of God should take

Our mortal form for mortal's sake."

-Thomas a Kempis

That's It

2011-02-21T15:20:00.003-05:00

I started this blog mainly to record the latest happenings of what my life is like in Andrews University. However, I have been out of Andrews for awhile now. Things have been quite busier, but adventures are still happening every now and then...

Here's what happened since my last blog entry:

1. I performed a one-hour organ recital at the Pioneer Memorial Church. (May 11)

2. I passed my Master's Comprehensive Exam! Yey!!!! (July 5)

3. I graduated with a Masters in Music Education. :) Whew! Praise the Lord! (August 1)

4. I moved my stuff to Wildwood, Georgia...

5. And went back to Berrien Springs to finish my project paper on "Seventh-day Adventist Doctrines in Seventh-day Adventist Hymnody from its Beginnings to Today" For a month, there was nothing to do but research, research, research, until I got so tired of it.

SO...that's the summary of my life in Andrews. Reports about Wildwood to come!

Short Thoughts...

2010-11-09T08:45:00.001-05:00

Wow. It truly has been a long time. My last post had been about my father's unexpected demise and that has been several months ago. Many things transpired after that: my brother was able to reconnect with my dad's side of the family (which was a blessing for me because until then, I have always wondered what my dad's family is like), I have accomplished the three greatest requirements for grad school (comprehensive exams, recital, and project paper), and finally, move out of what I got used to call "home" and start a new chapter of life here in Wildwood, Georgia.

I am still amazed at where God has brought me so far.

How Do I Say Goodbye?

2010-07-16T19:08:00.006-04:00

Better yet, what would I say about someone I really don't know but wished would've known better?
Better yet, what would I say about someone I really don't know but wished would've known better?

The question above stumps me. I search for memories, trying to capture moments I've spent with him that seem so very long ago. What I have are flashes of blurred scenes -- of me trying on his big shoes, of me asking him to draw pictures for my homework, of him cooking, laughing, impersonating, and lots and lots of him singing everywhere -- a quick slideshow of not so many pictures.

Yes, he loves to sing a lot, and that is something both my brother and I have come to love as well. However, I remember getting embarassed in church because he was singing so loud everyone kept giving him that "if looks could kill" stare. Nevertheless, he would sing louder and to his heart's content.

And then he had to leave. But his letters kept coming. He would tell me that he was doing fine and that he was proud of me and my brother. There were instances when he would say some things about his mom, about his new job, and of his new life. He wrote me a lot of letters and were sending them consistently. I would admit I loved getting them because I was curious to know who this man is. And never for one moment did I feel mad about him leaving because his absence was “replaced” with a lot more loving and caring by other members of the family.

Then the letters waned. It was either I got too busy or he had nothing more to say. He said he was getting sick and that he needed prayers. The letters stopped altogether and I was only left to wonder what has happened to him.

I remember him visiting us two times before I left for the US. It was not a very happy reunion. The healthy, robust, carefree, music-loving man that I remember him to be was not that man anymore. He was sickly thin, his eyes were sunken, his shoulders slumped, and he had an air of terrible loneliness about him…

That is the last picture I have of my father. A very sad and sick man.

One who does not know the whole story would probably ask many innocent questions. I have many questions, too, and I am sure my brother and my mom have more questions to ask than I do. He had his reasons to leave, and my mom had reasons to let him go. But, no one really knows the whole picture except the all-seeing, all-knowing Father who can read, understand and sympathize with the hurting hearts of His children.

I choose to be, therefore I am!

2010-06-24T10:03:00.006-04:00

God gave us a "dangerous" gift and that is the power to choose. Our first parents' choice to eat of the forbidden fruit, to transgress God's express command, led them to the "knowledge of good and evil" and sadly things have never been the same...

We are always faced with choices. Our lives are determined by what kind of decisions we made in the past. We can never predict the outcome of our choices, but we can always make the best out of what we have at the moment, knowing that the best choice now can be a better life the next minute, the next hour, or the next day.

A few minutes ago, I was griping at my deplorable state of unhappiness. Oh, I have reasons why I shouldn't be happy -- I'm stuck here in my room, studying for my comps (I shouldn't be writing this blog, but writing is such a catharsis and a good exercise to process my jumbled thoughts in a logical order) while the rest of the world is dandy happy.

I chose to be unhappy and so I was able to come up with so many reasons why I should be miserable:

I cannot go to Atlanta because I have to study for my comps
I did not go Hawaii because I had to study for my comps
I wanted to go to Canada but my visa expired, and I had to study for my comps
I want more work hours but I need to study for my comps
I could've done 1-4 if I had studied really hard in the last few months
etc... I'm too miserable to continue writing this list

And then, it hit me.

Hmm, let me say that better: IT hit me.

No, actually, it HIT me.

I am in my room, right now, studying for my comps.

I have been waking up at 3 am in the last few days just to study for my comps.

The skies are blue, birds are singing and FB statuses keep popping up on my screen reminding me that someone else is having the best time of his/her life...

So...what?!? Well, now what?!?

Hmmm...I can say, I choose to be thankful!

Why?

Because I have time to study for my comps :)
Because I don't get to spend :)
Because I get to experiment stuff in the kitchen during study breaks. Haha!
Because life after comps will be so much sweeter!!!

This reminds me of Jim Elliot's famous quote: "Let not your longing slay the appetite of your living." And..umm...studying can be fun...right?!

Even better, Paul's statements in Philippians 4: 4, 6-7 which says: "Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!...Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

And then verse 11 really hit it home for me: "Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content."

Musings about Mom

2010-05-09T21:06:00.003-04:00

I heard this song at Fairplain SDA church yesterday, and the words are just awesome!!! Here's the lyrics...and some side comments as well. :-)

Dearest mother, my close friend,

on this your day I reflect on how you've led.

You've led me forward, you've picked me up,

you've kept my eyes on what is true.

My mom has become a close friend and for that I am very thankful! I still remember my not-so rebellious younger years...and back then, I thought it would just be impossible to become a close friend of my mom. But I was clearly mistaken!
I am thankful that my mom has always supported and respected my choices in life. She was not the one who would force her way. However, she would firmly say "NO" to my requests if it meant crossing spiritual core values.
I still remember one time when I was 6 years old, I went to my aunt's house and took some food from the fridge without permission. I ate some then took some more to give it to my mom and was surprised at her reaction. "Don't you know it is considered stealing if you take someone else's stuff without permission?" she told me. "Thou shalt not steal. Isn't that in the 10 commandments?" And as if the reprimand wasn't enough, she told me to return it, not back in the fridge, but to my aunt. I was mortified. No way! But I had to. That lesson in honesty taught me a really valuable lesson from that day forward.
Another memory: A lot of my childhood days were spent playing with paper dolls, running across the strip of the neighbor's farmland behind our house, and/or trying to be one of the boys (my brother and his playmates -- they didn't always want me around, so I was not really successful with that), however, when the TV came to our house, it drastically stripped off my interest in the real world. Now, the TV we had back then was in black and white, and you have to get up and turn the knob to switch channels. Nevertheless, it kept me occupied. Then the neighbors got a bigger colored TV and a VHS player. So guess what, I would always be at the neighbors -- bewitched and bewildered -- with this "new" contraption. My mom, who never wanted the TV in the first place would first gently remind me (didn't work), would pinch and spank me (didn't work), until finally she locked me out of the house (well that worked for awhile). Needless to say, the Lord helped me overcome my love for media entertainment, and I have gained a greater appreciation for my mom's efforts.

Dearest Mother, truest friend,

today I thank you o’er and o’er again.

For all you've given, for all you've spent.

You walked beside me all the way.

I don't know how much my mom spent for me, and I wouldn't dare count the cost! The bill for all she spent would most likely total to this: PRICELESS. :-)

I love your counsel, I love your smile

and your commitment to go the extra mile.

You've held high standards yet joined our fun.

We give our thanks for all you've done.

I rarely see my mom smile -- because she always laughs, and really loud too!!!
Extra mile is my mom's specialty!

Heavenly Father, faithful God,

please bless my mother, draw her to Your side.

Endow their labors with strength Divine

such as the branch draws from the Vine.

Chorus
Thank you for being like Jesus,
thank you for choosing His way.
May the joy that I've found be a star in your crown
when He comes to turn the night into day.

Praise God!

2010-04-12T17:47:00.002-04:00

Members of Phi Kappa Phi took a group photo following a club sponsored lecture featuring Denis Fortin, dean of the Seminary. (Thursday, April 8. Photo by IMC student photographer Katelin Mitchell.)

A Question to Women

2010-03-26T11:57:00.004-04:00

I want to pose a question to women. Saying you have a career (which you absolutely loved) and you were doing very well -- you were earning good money and a good reputation for it as well. Then, in the course of time, you happen to meet this awesome guy who eventually asked you to marry him. However, getting married to the person actually meant giving up your career and live in the shadow of your husband. What would you do?

I was reading some articles this morning on J.S. Bach and his connections with Martin Luther, and it was very interesting to learn how Bach's second wife (his first wife died unexpectedly) gave up her career to live in the shadow of the great Johann Sebastian Bach.

You see...

...during the 17th century, women frequently appeared as soloists on the operatic stage and occasionally in vocal and instrumental music-making at court. As the 18th century progressed, women also began to sing religious music in churches and theaters. But the Lutheran church was a conservative institution in Bach's day. Aside from a few small rural churches where ladies were allowed to appear as "choral adjuncts," women played no role in the performance of the Lutheran church music. Ultimately, this affected the way the Bach family conducted its business.

When Bach arrived in Leipzig in 1723, he was accompanied by his four children and second wife, Anna Magdalena. Anna was a gifted singer who had been employed by the court of Cothen at a salary almost as great as that of her new husband. But moving to the Lutheran church position in Leipzig forced her to give up her career as a performer. Henceforth, Anna would serve as the nucleus of what might be termed "Bach Incorporated" -- that industrious group of some dozen or so children, relatives, and students who copied each new Bach cantata and all the necessary parts in preparation for the coming Sunday service. In their quarters next to the St. Thomas Church, Anna copied manuscript after manuscript for her husband. She may have assisted him with rehearsals as well.

The actual public performance of a cantata by Bach was an all-male affair as well. All instrumentalists, vocalists (soloists as well as choral singers) were boys or young men from the St. Thomas choir school or the nearby university. Thus the alto and soprano choral parts in Bach's sacred music were sung by males (young men in falsetto voice and boys), and the difficult soprano solos were executed by a solitary choirboy.**

So...would you have done the same thing as Anna did? Well, some would probably say --"Hey sure, if I'm gonna marry someone as famous as JS Bach, why not?!" But what if the man wasn't famous? (Besides, J.S. Bach wasn't famous in his time and it actually took several hundred years before people actually realized the value of his music).

I would say I admire Anna in a way because she chose to leave her booming career to support her husband. In return, in a very discrete way, she actually became a very important part of her husband's music ministry. It was a good thing because both their careers were sort of related in a way, and it was probably not as painful for her to give up her performance career because she was still working with music. Or it was probably even more painful, copying all those manuscripts that her husband composed and never able to have the chance to perform them. I don't know.

Whichever the case was, would you have done that if it was you?

**(Bib. Source: Wright, Craig and Bryan Simms. Music in Western Civilization. USA: Thomson Schirmer, 2006.)

Sumpong

2010-03-21T16:02:00.003-04:00

First things first...marahil ay nagtataka ang iba sa inyo kung bakit ko naisipang magtagalog. Well, isa lang ang reason, gusto kong maglabas ng sama ng loob pero hindi ko pwede ilabas in English dahil baka lusubin ako ng hindi oras ng taong pag-uusapan natin sa mga susunod na paragraphs.

Hindi naman dahil sa gusto kong mag-chismis. Baka lang kase kung mai-share ko ito sa inyo eh mabigyan nyo ako ng advice kung anong dapat kong gawin. Sya cge, tama na ang disclaimer...

Ok, so ano nga ba ang sumpungin? May topak, muryutin, masyadong sensitive? Maraming dahilan ang mga matatanda kung bakit sila may sumpong, pero kapag bata na ang pinag-uusapan, dahil sa hindi madali para sa kanila na mag explain at mag elaborate ng kanilang nararamdaman, nilalabas nila sa walang kibo, sa pang-iisnab, sa pag kunot ng noo, pag dadabog, at sa pag-iyak (Although, may mga matandang parang batang sumpungin...diba?)

Nonetheless, hindi yun excuse sa pagdadabog at pag susumpong ng isang bata. Kung sa lola at sa nanay ko yan, lalo ka pang makukurot kapag nagdabog ka.

Sabi ng mga experts, dahil daw sa panonood ng TV kaya nagiging ganito ang mga bata. At maaring ang kanilang kinalakihang environment eh ganun din -- pag may topak si nanay at si tatay, malamang, may topak din daw ang anak.

Meron akong piano student na saksakan ng pagka-sumpungin. Sa bawat araw na ginugugol naming mag-lesson, halos kalahati ng lesson time ay nagagamit ko para amuin ang batang ito. Syempre, dahil nasa Amerika ako, ang style ng pagtuturo eh hindi pwedeng idaan sa pamamagitan ng galit o pag bu-bully para lang sya mapasunod. At dahil naranasan ko naring mapagalitan at ma-bully nuong nag-aaral ako ng piano, alam kong hindi ito mabisa sa learning process ng isang bata.

Masyado daw perfectionist. Yun ang rason ng nanay. Kaya daw kapag pinapaulit-ulit ang pyesa, eh na ffrustrate sa sarili nya. So today, sinubukan ko mag experiment. Kahit mali mali yung tugtog nung bata, eh hindi ko pina-ulit. Instead, iniba ko yung direksyon ng lesson. Socratic style. In other words, tinanong ko sya ng about time signature, tinanong ko kung nararamdaman nya ba ang strong beats at weak beats ng pyesa. Tapos nag illustrate at nag bigay ako ng maraming examples para makuha nya yung ibig ko sabihin. Nakangiti ako at ginawa kong parang storytelling style ang aking pag-eexplain. Ang reaction? Tumalikod sa akin, huminga ng malalim na animo'y trying hard syang pag pasensyahan ako, at sumimangot.

Hayyyy...pwede na bang tumambling? Parang hindi na yata kase kaya ng powers ko ang batang ito eh.

So nang napansin ng nanay na tinotopak nanaman ang kanyang unica hija, sinigawan nya ito at sinabihang sumagot daw sa tanong ni teacher.

Aha!!! Di kaya dahil sa nanay kaya nagiging sumpungin si bata? Hmmmm...

Sumunod agad yung bata nang masigawan. Pero mukhang 3 seconds lang ang epekto. Nang tanungin ko ulit kung pwede nya ma-identify ang steady beat at kung saan ang strong beat ng pyesang tinutugtog ko, this time, bingi-bingihan naman at wala-akong-pakialam-sa-sinasabi-mo ang style na ginamit nya. (Ahem, been there, done that -- kaya alam ko!)

By this time, medyo nauubusan na ako ng magic tricks. So tinanong ko sya kung bakit sya biglang naging upset. Ang reaction? Juday style! Umiyak na isang luha lang ang lumabas habang passive ang mukha.

Panalo. Sana, acting classes nalang ang tinuro ko diba? :-)

Today's Perfect Gift

2010-03-16T07:58:00.003-04:00

God is indeed a God of good works (Phil. 1:6), and I would like to picture that these good works like a series of gifts. As I reflect on how the Lord has led in my life, I see God with all these gifts in His hands, just waiting for the right time to give each one.

You see, giving a gift is timing, too. If a gift is given at the right time, the gift is more appreciated and cherished. And so He holds it --- but He has it.

In this series of gifts, He only gives what is best for me. Nothing less than the best, I should say! Every gift is tailored in such a perfect way so as to suit me very well. Every gift He gives is good, and this helps me become more like Him. In fact, the gift will only be truly valuable if I use it to become more like Him.

When I was born to this earth, the gift-giving process started (well, I guess way before that). He gave me gifts in forms of musical talents, a godly family, poverty (yes, poverty is a gift!), etc. The experiences that I had, the lessons I learned from them were all gifts that He chose to give me at just the right time. I mean, isn't He a God that makes every thing beautiful in His time? (Eccl. 3:11)

Have you been given a gift you didn't like? Yet as a receiver of the gift, you have no choice but accept the gift, right? Once you accept it, the choice is yours whether you will use this gift or not. Thankfully, God gives us gifts that are useful to us. Not only that, He gives the best gifts He could possibly offer! And because He is God who sees the end from the beginning, whatever He gives is the only best thing you and I can have.

I believe that at this moment of my life, God has given me the gift of singleness. This is a gift that rarely anyone would choose. But then, we don't choose gifts, remember? Yesterday, that was the gift I received. Today, it is the gift that I receive as well. Tomorrow is not my business, but knowing that God gives only good gifts, I am willing to receive it from Him.

I hold this gift in my hands, yet sadly, it took me a long time to regard it as it is. Cursed, is what I would equate it with because I have such a limited view of God's infinite wisdom.

Picture a kid who asks his parents for a new bike. He keeps nagging his parents for a bike because all his playmates have one, therefore he must have it, too. Come his birthday, he receives a small wrapped box from his parents. Because he was expecting a bike, he throws the small box away, and throws a tantrum as well because he did not get what he wanted...not knowing that if he opened the box, he would find a key that will unlock his bike, which was waiting for him in the garage.

Singleness is like that wrapped box. Some people at the sight of it, not even bothering to open it, grumble and worry and complain because singleness is such a lonely and miserable life. I have to admit that I had moments where I had been like that. I was impatient, miserable and just really longing to be with someone, always thinking that "this too, shall pass."

God must have been so sad to see that reaction from me when I received the gift. He must probably be thinking, "If you only open this with different eyes, then you will see how valuable it is for you!"

And it is valuable indeed! What a priceless treasure! The more I ask God to give me eyes to see, the greater appreciation I have for this gift that luckily, I still have. Day by day, as I unwrap the box, God is revealing how much I needed this gift. Remember how each gift that God gives has that ultimate purpose that we may know Him and be like Him? Well, this particular gift is actually teaching me to have a dependence on God, and not on the capabilities of another human being; that I am complete and whole in Him and Him alone.

I thank you God for this gift of singleness. I am sorry for not appreciating it before. In my selfishness, I failed to see how valuable your gift is. I have underestimated Your wisdom and insulted Your omnipotence. Who am I to complain, a worm that I am?! This gift you give is a gift given out of love --- a perfect, matchless love --- and I never appreciated it.

Open my eyes, Father. Give me a clearer vision that this gift is what I need for today, and for as long as you want to give it. There is no one else that knows what I need, but You.

I now receive this gift with open, grateful arms. Help me grow closer to You as I explore the wonders of this gift that You have given me!

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning." James 1:17

Tangled Earphones

2010-03-08T21:14:00.005-05:00

Do you ever own earphones that loves to tangle itself easily? I do! Leaving behind my better earphones in my last trip to the Philippines, and being too lazy to buy new ones, I decided to look in my drawer, hoping to find old earphones.

I did find 3 pairs of earphones! Two of which are broken, and the third seemed like it was as good as my previous pair.

However, the longer I use them, the more I realize why they ended up being unused and forgotten. They are not as snug and comfortable to my ears, moreover, they love to tangle. I don't know how or why, but it seemed like it can do that by itself.

As I rush outside today to get myself to school, I decided I could use precious time by listening to Audioverse sermons while biking. I reach for my trusty iPod and the earphones, but as you would expect it, the earphones were tangled, even more tangled than a really messy braided hair.

I tried untangling it, but it was stubborn. By the time I untangle the other end, the opposite end will somehow find a way to entwine itself in a messy kind of way. I was getting a little impatient, but then the more I get impatient, the harder it was to untangle the earphones without destroying it.

Now, you might probably be wondering why I keep griping about these earphones. I might as well throw them, right? Well, friends, I would eventually do that but I learned a great lesson in the process.

You see, I am like that pair of earphones --- stubborn and would often times get myself entangled with sin. I have no way of untangling myself nor do I have a way of being usable unless I let God use me.

The Lord is patient. He waits until I come to grips with my sinfulness, and then the process of untangling begins again. Sometimes, the process would take years, and there are also other times when it is quick.

In that process, it may seem like He is "destroying" me, but it will only feel like that because I am impatient. Oh, He has so many ways and means of untangling me, and it is only by His grace that I can stay untangled. Nothing I can do but surrender my stubborn will, ask for strength and guidance to never get into such a mess ever again, and purpose in my mind and heart never to do it.

Do you find your life tangled in such a mess that you feel like there's no hope for you? Give yourself to Jesus. He who sees from the beginning to the end will be the only One who can disentangle you from the bondage of sin.

"Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage." Galatians 5:1

2010-03-01T17:51:00.002-05:00

Some say you know you're getting older when you start sleeping earlier. I don't know how true that is, but I do feel younger (not to say look like one) if I get a good sleep, let alone sleeping earlier.

I admit there were several times when I had to burn the midnight oil, and sleep around 3am or 4am. Sadly, the rest of the day was not as productive because I felt all my energy zapped out of me.

But the trouble arises when you have to abide by the schedule of the rest of the world. You know, the one that gets up early for their morning commute and snatches that proverbial worm. Here are eight painless ways to join the early bird ranks.

Make a nighttime routine. Half the battle of getting up earlier is falling to sleep at a reasonable hour. Start a nighttime routine that gets your body ready to relax, and put your routine in motion at least 8 hours before your alarm is going to go off in the morning. Maybe this includes taking a warm bath, having a cup of chamomile tea, deep breathing, or getting under the sheets and reading or writing in your journal. Create a ritual that will really get you to slow down and welcome an early bed time with open arms.

Turn off the TV and the computer. Television and the internet are too stimulating for pre-bedtime behavior. Don't watch TV in bed and stop surfing the internet long before your nighttime routine.

Lay off the caffeine. Nineteen cups of coffee during the day may be what's making you a night owl. Switch to decaf at 4pm at the latest, preferably earlier. Or don't take in anything at all.

Have a light supper. Those enchiladas don't just make you feel sluggish right after dinner. A heavy meal right before bed can disturb your sleep and make it harder for you to wake up in the morning. Stick to lighter nighttime meals for awhile, like soups, vegetarian stews, and hearty dinner salads. Or even better, skip the third meal.

Open the curtains. "Here comes the sun, little darling," and what a way it is to wake up. Excuse the corniness, but there's something life-affirming about greeting the day with the sun streaming into your bedroom. And then there's the practical reason -- it's hard to sleep with the sun in your eyes.

Know your motivation. If you want to wake up earlier just because you feel like a loser when you sleep in, that's not exactly what psychologists would call a positive motivator. You need a reason to do something to be successful, not just a reason not to do something else. Do you want to get to work before your boss so she can see you looking productive as soon as she walks in? Do you want to have time to write in the morning before the kids get up? Think about what's motivating you to become an early bird in the first place and write down all the reasons. Keep them next to your alarm clock as a motivating reminder when you want to hit snooze.

Make morning appointments. Schedule early morning meetings, workout sessions at the gym with a friend, and teeth cleanings. Make your obligation to wake up earlier not just to yourself but to someone else. You'll hold yourself more accountable if you know your bestie is waiting for you on the elliptical machine.

Single Life -- A Gift

2010-02-28T18:54:00.003-05:00

Every now and then, I read a book, put it down and never finish it. Not because I didn't like what it said (although that may sometimes be the case) but because I stumble upon powerful paragraphs that I cannot bear to turn to the next page until I have come into full grasp of what the author really meant.

Such is the case for Elisabeth Elliot's Let Me Be A Woman. Let me share one paragraph with you..

What we (women) are is a gift, and like other gifts, chosen by the Giver alone... (Singleness) I have learned that it is indeed a gift. Not one I would choose. Not one many women would choose. But we do not choose gifts, remember? We are given them by a divine Giver who know the end from the beginning, and wants above all else to give us the gift of Himself. It is within the sphere of the circumstances He chooses for us -- single, married, widowed -- that we receive Him. It is there and nowhere else that He makes Himself known to us. It is there we are allowed to serve Him.

Today...

2010-01-18T11:08:00.004-05:00

--I was told I have three months to prepare for my organ recital.
--I am struggling so hard to not fall asleep as I write my project proposal.
--I was told I have to memorize a considerable amount of my repertoire.
--I have a mountain of laundry to deal with and I wonder if I have enough detergent.
--I was asked how a training in health evangelism would complement my future career in music.
--I wonder why my project has no strong connection with my major degree.
--I will be making colonial wigs for a school play.
--I will be picking up the next batch of pecan banana bread.
--I shall be working in the music library for three hours.
--I hope to have more time to practice.
--I am impressed by God's love for me through His laws, which for me before were too legalistic.
--I am thankful that Olga was willing to wake up early to give me a ride to school.
--I am waiting for confirmation from several people regarding Revive.
--I might be coming down with a sore throat.
--I look forward to reading two books: "Music and Worship" and "The Use of Hymns"
--I need to hold on to my resolve that my relationship with God will be the priority above all other things.
--I commit my life to Him through the clothes I wear, the food I eat, the thoughts I think, the words I say, and the things I do.

How about you? How's your "today"?

Let Me Count the Ways

2009-12-30T17:14:00.007-05:00

Oh 2009! What a year! I left 2008 with a broken heart but full of resolutions and where did 2009 bring me? I would say it brought me to a deeper understanding of God's love.

You know Elizabeth Barrett Browning's famous sonnet that she wrote to her husband? It says:

"How do I love thee? Let me count the ways
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday's
Most quiet neet, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, -- I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! and if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after after death."

Hence, let me also count the ways in which God has showed His infinite, immeasurable and perfect love for me this year:

Heartaches. Well, I have to admit this in one way or another. I started this year blinded by feelings for someone who was clearly the wrong person for me (of course, I never saw that until later this year). As I have written earlier, I left 2008 with a broken heart and full of resolution...full of resolution that I can move on by myself without the help of other people, and even more dangerously, without the help of God. As the year wore on, my resolve waned and I found myself in an even deeper mess than before. By breaking my heart even more, God has showed me that His thoughts are not my thoughts, and my ways are not His ways. I had to learn this lesson in a hard way. But because of this, a fountain of other blessings were bestowed on me (like the ones that I would continue to enumerate below).
Salvation. In the realization that I was in a deep dark mess, I began to see the realness of God's gift of salvation. His death on the cross for my sins became so vivid like never before. True, I have always read, heard, taught, sang, saw a movie and cry about this but those were all on the surface. God's grace and mercy was bitter as I take it and yet the longer I chewed on it, the sweeter it became. Why bitter? Because I know I don't deserve it. There's nothing I have done (and could ever do) to have the life I live today, and yet God chose to save me.
Accountable Friends. One of the biggest ways God showed me His love was to put people in my path who will not only share my joys and keep me company, but friends who would look at me straight in the eye and tell me I have done wrong, share my tears, and then keep tabs on me to make sure I walk the straight and narrow path. Not all friends can be like that, and on my previous unconverted life, I would have avoided these kind of people. However, they proved to be one of the biggest blessings I have received this year.
Financial Difficulties. God also chose to show His love for me by "straining" the inflow of cash. I began to understand that even though I always struggle financially, the amount of time praying about it had been worth all the trouble. Once again, a stream of blessings overflowed from this particular trial, like getting a...
New JOB. Because my graduate assistantship expired after the spring semester, I had to look for another job...any job that would hire me as soon as possible. And God led me to the dining services. I had second (and third) thoughts about working there but it seemed that it was where He was leading me. My patience was was taken to a completely new level by working with so many different personalities and by learning so many new things at a faster pace. Yet my fingers are still intact despite several accidents, I have become less clumsy in the kitchen, added several pounds due to free meals (and was able to feed other hungry classmates too), and gained many other friends, etc, etc..
Travels. By far, this has been the only year that I travelled the most internationally. The first day of 2009 found me in Canada; some weeks of my summer were spent in some parts of Italy, Germany, France, Switzerland, and Netherlands; and in this last day of the year, I am so blessed to be back in the Philippines to be in my brother's wedding, attend a family reunion, and reconnect with old friends and colleagues. Again, thanks to all the people who made these travels possible!
REVIVE. What I initially thought to be a mere extra-curricular activity to get more involved in Andrews turned out to be another dimension of walking the Christian walk. As God continued to heal me, He got me involved with a ministry that will open my mind to a lot of things that revealed who He is.

Oh, I can only sigh at this year that just passed me by. However, the journey has been so worth it! As I look forward to 2010, I am filled with excitement with whatever the Lord has in store for me. It will surely come in shapes and sizes beyond my imagination, but I have the assurance that whatever comes from Him is "a good and perfect gift." I only pray that He finds me faithful everyday to receive such a gift.

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We are now entering upon a new year, and may it prove a beginning of years to us. If in the old year we have made failures, let us commence the new by rectifying these errors as far as we can. If the old year has borne into eternity a spotted record of opportunities neglected and privileges slighted, let us see that that of the new year is free from these blemishes. Its days are all before us; let us begin now to make the history of each as it passes, such as we shall not tremble to meet in the judgment. Let us fill each one full of loving, helpful work for others. Let us develop all our powers, and make of ourselves all that God designed that we should. -EWhite {AUCR, January 5, 1914 par. 6}

When God Humbles

2009-12-07T14:09:00.005-05:00

Have you ever prayed to God, "Lord, please humble me" ? If so, I'm sure God was happy to answer that particular prayer. How did He answer you?

Today, despite the rush of scrambling for preparing for final exams, I would like to set aside a time to share with you how God answers this prayer for me, particularly in today's events.

The Pharisee Mentality

For morning devotion, I have started reading the Desire of Ages and this morning, I came upon the chapter talking about the time when Jesus ate with the publicans and the tax collectors. The Pharisees, who were always ready to find fault in Jesus' ministry, asks the disciple why they would eat with "sinful" people. But Jesus answers and says that he came for those who are sick, for those in need of a Physician that they will be made whole. That He came for those who are sinful, that they can come to repentance.

Many times, when I read about these stories, I am ready to point my fingers at the Pharisees. At the same time, I am at the look-out for Pharisees in my community, and yes, ready to point my fingers at them the minute they impose their legalistic views on people. However, this morning, I had a deep sense that I had been a Pharisee at some point.

I heard someone say, "You may eat all the organic stuff in the world, you may wrap yourself in clothes of modesty, you may not wear all that glitters, but if you don't know how to love your neighbor, then your religion is vain."

Putting Coals of Fire on Someone's Head...NOT :-(

I was cutting the last batch of watermelons in the cafeteria today when I realized that it was my last day to work at the salad area. Now, to tell you the truth, working in this particular area is challenging due to the fact that the manager can be very nice at one point, and can be the exact opposite after a few minutes. All clashing personalities aside, I was truly thankful for the way she trained me in being more organized in the kitchen.

As I prepare to leave for my shift, I get my meal portion for the day and goes to her to let her know how grateful I am to have worked with her. Before I can even speak, she tells me, "You're not allowed to bring food outside. You're supposed to eat it here."

"Oh, I didn't realize that," I answer, "I have always been doing this and no one ever told me I can't take my food outside."

"Well, I'm telling you now, you can't bring it outside. You either eat it here or you don't take it out, it's your choice."

"Oh, well. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that this is my last day to work and.."

"And did you find someone else to replace you already for tomorrow?"

"Uhh, I was going to do that after talking to you."

"Ok, whatever!" And she turns around.

At this time, I didn't know whether to tell her what I wanted to tell her. Thinking about it now, maybe I still should have said it. But I guess I was too proud to say something nice when she already hurt my feelings.

Paying it Forward

A colleague who has recently graduated, comes in at the library. While processing his photocopies, I casually asked him how he paid for his tuition while studying here.

"Oh, the Lord paid for it," he states in a matter-of-fact way.

"Ok. I'm sure the money did not just land on your doorstep. How did the Lord pay for your tuition then?"

"Well, several people whom I don't know were willing to pay for me." Then he proceeded to tell me his experiences of being kicked out of his apartment because he did not have enough money to pay, how he was sent to court because of his inability to pay, and then how anonymous people helped him pay for whatever he needed, how other people were willing to let him stay in their houses until he can live on his own again.

"In a nutshell, I survived because I know God brought me here, and I knew that if I don't have anything of what I need, He will provide. He never failed. Help came and it was always at the right time. I know you're asking me this question because you're maybe experiencing the same thing. But just trust Him. Don't lose hope. If you know that God brought you here, then He will make the means for you to survive."

Then he hands me a wad of 19 dollar bills. "Here, get yourself some lunch." I looked at him at disbelief. Not because I was insulted, no! But because despite of my Pharisaic attitude, the Lord still extends His mercy and love to me in so many surprising ways. "I cannot accept it! You said you were looking for a job yourself, and what you even do now to earn a living is not giving you enough! Surely, you need it!" "No, no..You need it more than I do. Use it."

Indeed, for a struggling graduate student, $19.00 is a big thing. I accepted it knowing that it is more blessed to give than to receive, and I will not hinder the blessings he would receive because he has been very generous.

A Toothpaste Miracle

Before, I go back to review for my archaeology finals, let me share another personal miracle story that happened this weekend:

For two weeks until last Friday, I have been including in my prayers something small (and maybe stupid). I told God that I'm running low on toothpaste and that I don't have the money to buy one. I was reminding Him (actually I was reminding myself more) about the story of the widow of Zarepath who was gathering sticks so she can cook the last meal for her and her son. But because she was willing to share with the prophet Elijah, her jar of oil and flour never ran out. She always had enough of what she needed. So every time I squeeze out some toothpaste from the tube, and every time I brush my teeth this little miracle story would run in my head. I would then pray and brush my teeth at the same time, strengthened by the story, and inspired to live the moment until I brush my teeth again, knowing full well that I will never run out. I know, I know, it would have been easy to ask from other people. But this time, I just wanted to ask God Himself to provide for me.

Well, last Friday before going to Revive, I finally rolled the tube, flattened it out, and squeezed out the last morsel of toothpaste. I didn't throw the tube, instead, I put it inside the drawer, expecting to use it again before I sleep.

What do you think happened?

Well, I get home late that night and found that the toothpaste tube is still empty. However, two big never-been-used toothpaste tubes were lying on the counter. I asked my roommate if she bought them. She said no, but she said a friend brought it, thinking that we might be needing some.

------

I guess the point is, while God can humble us in embarrassing, humiliating ways, He also does it by lavishing us with His love...

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us...For if, when we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation. " Romans 5:8, 10-11, NIV.

Eleven Ways to Destroy Corporate Worship

2009-10-27T16:36:00.002-04:00

I stumbled upon this article while searching about SDA hymnody, and thought I would share it with you! :-)

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Here are some "tested" tips on how to keep your worship events from being a blessing.

1. Put people up front who are somber and unexpressive. This will remind everyone how hard it is to be a Christian.

2. Cater to the preferences of one generation. That way everyone who isn't part of that age-group will feel unwelcome and alienated.

3. Don't try anything new or different. Change makes everyone nervous, especially if it involves butchering "sacred cows."

4. Pick only music that's 100 years old. It may not speak to anyone present, but it probably won't be offensive either.

5. Make theological controversies the focus of your service. This is a sure way to help people express their anger.

6. Take up three or four offerings. How else will people learn to sacrifice if they don't have to give "til it hurts?"

7. Make sure no one can hear what's being said. This will make them wonder why they came. A good way to implement this is to ignore your aging sound system.

8. Plan for the morning prayer to last 15-20 minutes. By the end of the prayer everyone will hate the idea of kneeling.

9. Refuse to let children or youth have any part in the service. This will remind them that the service is only for "grownups."

10. Make people feel guilty for not doing more for the church. Somehow, they need to realize that nothing else matters.

11. Forget to make Jesus the focus of your worship. You can talk about church socials, bike trips and bake sales, but don't talk about Jesus. A good starting place is to feature sermons that focus on personal development and self-help theories.

Obviously, we're not encouraging anyone to try these. The question to ponder is, are we doing any of these unknowingly? If so, it is not too late to start over. Try reversing the above negatives and find fresh, joyful ways to make your corporate worship the climax of the week!

Author: Rich DuBose

Fall Break Reflections

2009-10-13T17:46:00.003-04:00

Oh my. Fall break has come and gone, and yet here I am, feeling like it never really happened at all.

Don't get me wrong. I have been very productive! (At least I think so). I mean, I had this archaeology midterm exam which I needed to study for. (You might be asking why on earth am I taking an archaeology class--well, that is another story!). And I am now able to play "In Thee Is Gladness, BWV 615" without stumbling. I have also finished reading "A Woman Rides the Beast" by Dave Hunt, and hopefully by the end of the week, I have written my 5-10 page reflection paper for the Great Controversy tour.

I was also able to run another 5k yesterday, despite the cold weather. I discover that if I start from the road going down to the dairy farm, and back up again all the way to the University clinic and back in the campus through the main entrance, I am less tired, I have more stamina to run more and walk less. Today is not my day to run, tho, because I have to sub for a co-worker. Pretty soon, I have to be joining that aerobics class, especially when it snows.

A few hours ago, I have breathed "mi ultimo adios" to my Compaq laptop. Yup. It was kinda hard to let go, especially since I have no means of replacing it right away. But, I should be fine. That means I have less time dilly-dally with my time on the computer.

So. It's back to basics, Irene. Back to spending hours in the James White library, to my old trusty thumb drive, to fashioning my hours according to the availability of people who give me rides, and to cooking.

Cooking? Yes! Unfortunately, the cafeteria management is not giving 11-dollar free meals to their workers anymore. We can still avail a 40% discount on all our purchases, granted that we work the same day. We are still entitled to a free breakfast (only after working for two hours), and can take home the leftovers that the manager decides to give away before throwing it out.

But I shall cease to gripe and rant about that. Because in reality, it is still a blessing! It will be a shame to admit this, but just a few weeks before, I was "complaining" to Andres that I'm gaining so much weight from all the free food I'm getting. He was complaining about the same thing, too. Actually, it's just like complaining about the weather being too cold or too hot. The human being will never really be satisfied. Suffice it to say that satisfaction shall only be in Jesus.

Oh, and of course, I have had time to blog. That could count as an accomplishment, too, right?

Tomorrow, classes shall resume and shall go on and on and on, until mercy finds me "resting" (a.k.a working instead studying) again on Thanksgiving break.

For the rest of the week, I'm looking forward to:

more reading (Bible, Desire of Ages, Mozart's Sister, Archaeology in the Old Testament, and a bunch of articles on church music)
playing the organ at the Village Church this Saturday, and master class at PMC on Sunday (which means more practice!!!!)
working (woohoo!)
another free concert at HPAC by the famous Storioni Trio
Revive vespers
Sabbath!!!!!

And to make this blog insanely long, I would like to share an excerpt from Buell Kazee's "Faith is the Victory" (big thanks to Mrs. Damsteegt because this was such a huge blessing to me, too!) God bless and may you have an awesome rest of the week!

**emphasis mine

God has called you to be really like Christ in all your spirit, He will draw you into a life of crucifixion and humility and put on you such demands of obedience, that He will not allow you to follow other Christians, and in many ways He will seem to let other good people do things which He will not let you do.

Others can brag on themselves, and their work, on their success, on their writings, but the Holy Spirit will not allow you to do any such thing, and if you begin it, He will lead you into some deep mortification that will make you despise yourself and all your good works.

The Lord will let others be honored and put forward, and keep you hid away in obscurity because He wants to produce some choice fragrant fruit for His glory, which can be produced only in the shade.

Others will be allowed to succeed in making money, but it is likely God will keep you poor because he wants you to have something far better than gold and that is a helpless dependence on Him; that He may have the privilege of supplying your needs day by day - out of an unseen treasury.

God will let others be great, but He will keep you small. He will let others do a great work for Him and get credit for it, but He will make you work and toil on without knowing how much you are doing; and then to make your work still more precious, He will let others get the credit for the work you have done, and this will make your reward ten times greater when He comes.

The Holy Spirit will put strict watch over you, with a jealous love, and will rebuke you for little words and feelings, or for wasting your time, which other Christians never seem distressed over.

So make up your mind that God is an infinite Sovereign, and has a right to do what He pleases with His own, and He will not explain to you a thousand things which may puzzle your reason in His dealing with you. He will wrap you up in a jealous love, and let other people say and do many things that you cannot do or say.

Settle it forever, that you are to deal directly with the Holy Spirit, and that He is to have the privilege of tying your tongue, or chaining your hand, or closing your eyes, in ways that others are not dealt with.

Now, when you are so possessed with the Living God that you are, in your secret heart, pleased and delighted over this particular personal, private, jealous guardianship and management of the Holy Spirit over your life, you will have found the vestibule of heaven.

An Attractive Company

2009-10-11T09:56:00.007-04:00

On any given Saturday night, the church youth, like some sort of tradition, would usually hang out at someone's apartment to close the Sabbath, have dinner together and play games.

Last night was, of course, one of those nights. As we close the Sabbath together, I was impressed with Ellen White's dream that Steve was reading aloud to us. It is about Mrs White's vivid recollection of the Christian walk with God powerfully illustrated by people walking on the straight and narrow path, with a great chasm beneath them, and a cord helping the travelers walk the rugged road.

As we close the worship in prayer, I was pervaded with this deep sense that I would like to be a part of that group who were able to walk through the chasm until the very end. I don't remember much about what I prayed for, but I can tell you what I forgot which I now remembered while reading a relevant passage in the Desire of Ages.

I prayed that as we continue to fellowship with one another that night, may the conversation I engage in and the thoughts I would think about would always be of things above. I, in my heart, know my "old-man" tendencies that on a Saturday night, part of the "holy robe" I put on Sabbath is being cast off. I was praying for that because in my previous unconverted life, I loathed it when the family would call me to close the Sabbath after sunset. At that time, I know that as soon as the sun sets, I could watch all the movies I like, go out with friends to the mall, etc. It felt like the whole Sabbath made me so thirsty of the worldly things which I was doing the rest of the week, and that my one day rest made me miss out on a lot of things in the world.

However, I can never really thank God enough for His patience with me. As I begin to understand more, not only about the Sabbath, but being a real Seventh-Day Adventist, spending more time with Him, even throughout the week, became more pleasurable and a delight. Slowly but surely, I was losing my appetite for movies and shallow conversations. And Saturday became one those days that I just want to last forever, not only for reasons that I don't have to work or to do assignments.

As the night wore on, I gradually forgot what I prayed for and my mind was going through things that were mundane and shallow. I lost my guard, and now, as I am able to recall it, my actions were not favorable in God's sight. Let me share with you the passage that led me to remember this: (In context, the Israelites were coming from the Passover feast held in Jerusalem)

"God desired that they should be led to prayerful study and meditation in regard to Christ's mission. Bus as the multitudes left Jerusalem, the excitement of travel and social intercourse too often absorbed their attention, and the service they had witnessed was forgotten. The Saviour was not attracted to their company."

The question dawned on me. Would my company last night be an attractive one had the Saviour been physically there in our midst?

The story goes on that as Joseph and Mary traveled, their minds were preoccupied with so many other things (to think that they were coming back from the Passover rites). The next passages of Mrs. White is powerful and so relevant, not only in my experience last night, but it made me realize even more how much of my life have been squandered away, just because of my careless words, my thoughts, and my actions.

"If Joseph and Mary had stayed their minds upon God by meditation and prayer, they would have realized the sacredness of this trust, and would have not lost sight of Jesus. By one day's neglect they lost the Saviour; but it cost them three days of anxious search to find Him. So with us; by idle talk, evilspeaking, or neglect of prayer, we may in one day lose the Saviour's presence; and it may take many days of sorrowful search to find Him, and regain the peace that we have lost.

In our association with one another, we should take heed lest we forget Jesus, and pass along unmindful that He is not with us. When we become absorbed in worldly things so that we have no thought for Him in whom our hope of eternal life is centered, we separate ourselves from Jesus and the heavenly angels. These holy beings cannot remain where the Saviour's presence is not desired, and His absence, not marked. This is why disappointment so often exists among the professed followers of Christ...

As we associate together, we may be a blessing to one another. If we are Christ's, our sweetest thought will be of Him. We shall love to talk of Him; and as we speak to one another of His love, our hearts will be softened by divine influences. Beholding the beauty of His character, we shall be "changed into the same image from glory to glory." (Desire of Ages, 83)

Now that the Sabbath has passed and I am faced with the activities for the week, may Christ find my company attractive, and to others, a blessing.

Join My Contest!

2009-10-08T14:27:00.001-04:00

If it is not obvious yet, let me make an official statement that this banana bread study is making me crazy! Don’t get me wrong, the banana bread tastes wonderful. But eating three big slices of the same thing everyday, for sixteen weeks? Will that not drive you crazy enough? Oh, and did I mention that slowly, but surely, I can tell that I am gaining pounds that normally would be welcome only on Christmas break?

Oh my, oh my…what have I gotten myself into?

However, it is too late to back out now. In fact, I really don’t consider backing out as an option right now. I still think I’ll be able to make it through the remaining 15 weeks, hateful of every banana bread in sight and slightly chunkier than usual, but I shall make it through.

Anyway, enough of my self-pep talk.

Here’s my dilemma. I am a creative person. And when it comes to food, I crave for variety. Rice would be a touchy issue to talk about now, but if you know me well enough, you would not be surprised to see me eat savory foods and sweet foods alternately in a given meal. And dessert is not something I would eat at the last part of the meal. I would take bites of the dessert while eating the main course to give my tastebuds a little adventure.

And so, eating the same exact thing every single day is such a torture!

Enough ranting. It’s time to get pro-active.

So here’s the deal. I need ideas on how I can eat banana bread in several creative ways. You can leave a comment here by saying “You can eat banana bread with…” and then your suggestion. I will promise to try whatever you have suggested as long as it’s edible, vegetarian, and available in stores. If I happen to really like your suggestion, I will be sending you something nice when I go back to Philippines this Christmas (granted the suggestor is not from the Philippines), or something from US (granted the suggestor is not a resident of US or Canada) :-)

Let the contest begin!

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**PS: Combinations I have already tried in the last three weeks

1. Banana bread with soymilk

2. Banana bread with vegan Roma ice cream

3. Banana bread with buttered vegetables

4. Banana bread with mushroom cream vege-patties

5. Banana bread with garbanzos soup

Lolo Romanes

2009-09-11T06:23:00.004-04:00

"Sir Romanes" as he is fondly called by many AUP/PUC students has recently passed away. However, I call him "Lolo Romanes", not only because he is well advanced in years compared to my age, but because of the deeper connection between his family and mine.

Many Facebook status and comments recall him as the guy who taught Filipino classes, the guy that takes a lot of pictures of people around the campus, the guy that plays the harmonica, and more than once, a notorious matchmaker. I am glad that I share some of those memories, too.

What first comes to mind is that he would usually come by at the house in the morning after his morning walks, asking my mom if his wife has a letter for him. Or sometimes, he would come by because he has a letter for his wife. And just before he leaves, he will make comments about the fact that I am still single, and that someday, he will find the guy for me. I will jovially respond with, "Lolo, that would be impossible!" But he would smirk, or grin, and I will never know, until Marvin.

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Marvin, if you're reading this blog you know what I am talking about. Earth science with Mrs. Salazar. It has completely escaped my mind what project we were supposed to do for this class, but I remember having Marvin in my group. This is the era where Facebook is not yet invented, and MySpace or Hi5 is still unheard of in the Philippines. Friendster was still a new thing, and has not yet caught up with the rest of us.

In AUP, there's this bridge that connects the church and gate to the rest of the campus. This is one of the busiest roads, although some people would choose to use the shortcut behind the apartments. It was on this bridge that Marvin and I were brainstorming about what we could do for the Earth science project when, of all people, Lolo Romanes, passed by.

There was no mistaking for the twinkle in his eyes and that wide Cheshire cat grin. From then on, he would always ask me, "How is that young man of yours?" I kept explaining that it was not what he think it was, and he would always reply with, "I don't care. Even if there was nothing between the two of you, just giving you reminders of him is good enough for me." I don't know if he gave Marvin a hard time, too, but Lolo Romanes was adamant and determined to "find the man for me."

I also remember typing parts of his manuscript for him. He was translating the Great Controversy in Filipino (Tagalog) and he would bring in chapter by chapter, every week or so. But because my mom was (and still is) a better typist than I am, she ended up typing most of it.

He is also one of the early birds in church. Without fail, he would be sitting outside of PIC before Sabbath school, playing his harmonica, or blowing on a leaf, and actually make music out of it! I would admit tho that on the times I come early, I would choose another entrance, to avoid his jovial comments about my single status. But I never really succeeded. He would see me, even from afar off, and would wave at me. With that familiar twinkle and gleam on his face, I already know what was coming.

Oh, there are still many more memories. Suffice it to say, this old man has made my stay in AUP a bit more unusual, adding a hint of color to my college life.

Thank you, Lolo Romanes. See you in the morning!

Lessons on Pineapple Cutting

2009-09-08T13:02:00.003-04:00

I breezed in the cafeteria kitchen this morning with a happy smile. The salad leader smiled back and pointed to 20 wet pineapples and a knife, “You go eat your breakfast and when you’re done you can start cutting the pineapples.”

Three things. I don’t like cutting pineapples and I don’t like cutting pineapples! I’m not exactly a fan of pineapple either, but that really isn’t the case here. In fact I would consider myself lucky because I only get to cut them…not eat them!

As I cut the first pineapple, I could feel the salad leader watching me with eagle eyes. And that would be the third thing--I don’t like someone watching me doing things I don’t want to do! She inched closer to me, and I already knew what was coming--a lecture on the art of cutting pineapples. Now I don’t mind learning the art of cutting zucchini , carrots, even onions or whatever vegetable or fruit imaginable. Well, with the exception of you know what.

Turned out, the lecture wasn’t so bad. In fact, she was very patient and very precise with her instructions. At least she cut the first two pineapples and that leaves me with 18.

Sighs.

Cutting doesn’t really require a lot of thinking…which left my mind wandering off from one end of the earth to the other. The Holy Spirit, however, has a way of harnessing my mind back to reality by reminding me of the verse in 2 Corinthians 10:5, “Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.”

“Ok, God. Then provide me with thoughts to think about because I am really bored with cutting all these pineapples,” I mused.

To my surprise, a thought came to my mind which seemed to say, “I’ll teach you the real art of cutting pineapples.” I wanted to laugh, but since I was surrounded with other people cutting vegetables with immense seriousness, I held it back.

“What do you think of the knife you’re using right now?”

Uh, well, it’s pretty sharp…I mean, the skin of the pineapple is really hard but I have a good knife so it makes it easy to cut.

“You mention the skin of the pineapple, what do you think of the skin?”

Well, it’s hard and spiky, obviously. But not as spiky as the crown.

“Yes, the crown is another thing. It is actually the first thing you cut off from a pineapple, right?”

Of course! How can I cut the rest if I don’t take that off first?

“What is the next thing you cut then?”

The bottom.

“And then?”

And then I cut the skin off…

“When the skin is off, what do you see?”

The eyes! Which is such a pain to cut!

“So what do you do next after that?”

I cut the hard part out, then I cut the “meat” in smaller pieces, put them in a serving tray, and it’s ready to go.

“Your knife represents the word of God. Do you know that ‘the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.’(Heb.4:12). And you, well, you are the pineapple.”

I am???

“Yes, the spiky crown on your head represents your pride, the hard spiky skin reflect your character. The eyes represent your focus. You have so many eyes and you turn to so many other things in the world to comfort you and to make you happy. You are also quick to see other people's faults. Then the hard core of the pineapple is your stubborn heart. And so you see, all of these need to be cut off with a sharp knife. The process is hard, but in the end, when all the unnecessary things are cut off, then the pineapple becomes a pleasure to eat. Just as you become when you let the Holy Spirit fill you.”

By the time the “lecture” was over, I noticed that I was done cutting all the pineapples, too. The salad leader comes and looked at all the cut pineapples. She gives me a side hug. “Good job! Now you’re ready to cut all 10 watermelons…”

Hey, you know what? Bring it on!

Not Another One of Those Blah Days

2009-09-06T00:19:00.004-04:00

There is indeed a time when things get a little bit lonelier. It is the time I miss my family and friends a little bit more than the usual, and a lot of things would remind me more of home and of fond memories from my "carefree" days in the Philippines.

On these lonelier days, it would seem that I get things done faster than usual which leaves me with more time for myself. And although there are still a lot of things to do, the motivation to do things seem harder to find.

Last Thursday can be categorized into one of these lonelier days. And actually, it became a very good opportunity to talk to God on a deeper and more personal level. On these days, I get more sober, reflective, and ponderous (if that word exists) of the things in my life and the more I think about the blessings of being "alone", the more I was seeing that it actually is a gift from God that can be hard to recognize on most times if one is not watchful.

Loneliness is a hard thing to overcome if not brought to God in prayer. One may be in the company of good friends, or may be at the heart of a great event, or even be busy with important things, but if loneliness is not brought to God, the source of all true happiness, then life will indeed "grow strangely dim".

On these lonely moments, I find myself wishing "Oh, it would've have been better if so and so was here." I mean, there are some things in life that seem to be more enjoyable if I am in the company of someone who enjoys the very same thing. The ironic part of this scenario tho is that the more I think of the "would've been's", the more I deprive myself of the happiness that could come from doing things solo.

It was the slowest bike ride from Andrews to Kephart Lane. Normally, I would be rushing to go home so I can get more things done. But the more I pondered, the more I enjoyed my slow pace. The sky was rosier than usual, and the calm breeze blowing on my face was a soothing balm. I notice a guy crossing the sidewalk to get his mail from his box.

I chucked a bit to myself. "When was the last time I received mail?" I found myself asking. I mean I do receive stuff from the bank or from journal subscriptions or from the stuff I order from Amazon. But something from someone I know? Nah...it has been a long time. And the thought just weighed down on me one more time. LONELINESS.

Sighs.

As I turned at the driveway by the garage, I noticed a package placed by the door. My initial thought was that my roomate ordered something from Amazon again. Or it might be another one of those parcels for one of my housemates.

I picked it up and to my surprise, the package was addressed to me! No name was on the return address, the address itself was from a place where I do not know anyone, and the handwriting was unrecognizable either. I racked my brain with guesses. "Could it be from my cousin? But this is not her address. Maybe she moved. Or maybe, it still is for one of my housemates and this person just addressed it to me." Now, how weird of a guess was that?

I tried shaking the box to try to figure out what it could be. I could just have ripped it open to save myself from guessing. But I wanted to savor the feeling of receiving something from the mail. I felt like that little kid who keeps trying to shake the gifts under the Christmas tree in impatience.

Finally, I get to my room and just ripped the tape off the box. And it did feel like my birthday and getting a gift for Christmas all at once. (Now I don't believe in Christmas...but that's another article to write about).

Turned out that this mysterious person sent me a box of assorted stuff like some food that I've been craving for for the longest time, but didn't have enough money to buy and some stuff for winter. Then a note.

So I finally found out that the sender is from one of my recently added friends in Facebook. She tells me that it was weird sending me stuff since we haven't met yet, but she just felt like sending it to me after reading my blog.

Hmmm. Somehow I find that very interesting. (Hi Manang Gigi! I had to write about you. That's what happens when you surprise a blog writer---you get blogged! Hope you don't mind, tho.)

I remember a very similar incident like this a year ago. I was feeling pretty much the same way and I get home and I get all these letters and cards and pictures from my cousins in Toronto! Apparently, it's not the same when you see this pictures posted in Facebook, or when I get an email from one of them.

But while I feel very grateful to these people who sends me stuff (oh you don't know how much much much I appreciate it), I feel more thankful to God, My tenderloving Father, "who forgets not His own"!

And I guess a song comes to mind which pretty much says it all...

"Does Jesus care when my heart is pained too deeply for mirth and song;
As the burdens press, and the cares distress, and the way grows weary and long?

Oh yes, He cares-- I know He cares! His heart is touched with my grief;
When the days are weary, the long nights dreary, I know my Saviour cares."

Lilies and Ravens

2009-08-10T22:41:00.005-04:00

Now Elijah the Tishbite, from Tishbe in Gilead, said to Ahab, "As the LORD, the God of Israel, lives, whom I serve, there will be neither dew nor rain in the next few years except at my word."

And it came to pass after a while, that the brook dried up, because there had been no rain in the land.

------------

Ever since I came back from Europe, a 'feat' deemed impossible for an international student without loans and sponsors, I have always asked the question, "What do I eat tomorrow?" Although my money was well spent in learning from and experiencing life in several countries, I knew the next weeks of my life after that would have to be lived in unimaginably frugal ways. So I tried an experiment and told myself that no matter how hungry I am, I will not spend my last few dollars on food, but will rely instead on the providence of God.

So for a few days, I was living on granola and soymilk. After all, that's what my pantry had. I informed my Facebook friends via my status that I was on "the diet", to make a joke out of it. Besides, problems can be easily survived with prayer and a dash of humor.

My resolve to not spend money on food became more resolute when I started refilling my shampoo bottle with water, twisting the poor toothpaste tube to agony, and hold my thirst for the whole night until I get to work the next morning and drink freely from the campus water fountain.

I had four weeks before class starts. That meant I only had four weeks to work, and according to my human, finite mind, four weeks of work will not be enough to pay for what I still owe from last Spring semester's tuition, let alone a sizeable downpayment so I can register for this coming Fall semester.

My graduate assistantship job is still unsure, my boss at the library cut my work hours in the library, and I'm not getting as much hours I need to work in the cafeteria to fill in the much needed 40 hours of work in a week. I was working less, so I was praying more.

------------

Then the word of the LORD came to Elijah: "Leave here, turn eastward and hide in the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan. You will drink from the brook, and I have ordered the ravens to feed you there."

So he did what the LORD had told him. He went to the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan, and stayed there. The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook.

------------

Then the "ravens" started coming.

My boss started bringing lunch almost everyday for the rest of the library workers. I get to substitute for a friend at the cafeteria and get free breakfasts. A friend would invite me over to eat at her house. The mom of one of my piano students gave me some vegetables from her garden. The lady I live with would leave food on my kitchen table.

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Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? "Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

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Yes, I am well-fed. ;-) In fact, I try to jog as regularly as I can to shed the pounds of God's blessings. I have also found a big bottle of shampoo I have stored for future use, but had forgotten about it. I would find spare change every now and then from my bags and my pants and my wallet, just enough to buy toothpaste and drinking water, and occasionally delicious red grapes.

And how about the money I owe Andrews? Well, I don't know where I would get that, nor do I know how I will be able to register. But this one thing I know, the God that provided the lamb for Abraham's burnt offering to replace Isaac, the food for Israel and his sons during the famine, the protection and sustenance for the Israelites in the wilderness, the wheat that Ruth was able to glean, and the raven that fed Elijah is the same God I have!

Boojiboo Flirty Apron GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

2009-07-23T15:11:00.000-04:00

Boojiboo Flirty Apron GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Grosgrain: 20 Minute Simple Skirt Tutorial AND GIVEAWAY!!!!

2009-07-23T15:10:00.000-04:00

Grosgrain: 20 Minute Simple Skirt Tutorial AND GIVEAWAY!!!!

Hello, hello.

2009-07-21T10:53:00.010-04:00

Hey peeps! Yes, I am officially back from Europe. Technically, I was back Thursday, but I had to grab another suitcase the same day and head for the Upper Peninsula (the better side of Michigan) to camp out with the rest of the youth group from the Fil-Am church.

Now things are running quite smoothly again---I am scheduled to work regularly in the MMC and the AU cafe again. I shall be working this Sunday in Riverview Park church, and hopefully meet with my piano students.

Yes, I do have lots of stories from Europe to share but I kinda want to do it in a slideshow format, so I guess that would have to take some time. My pictures need to be edited, some of them still needs to be retrieved from my friend's computer, and I am also waiting for other pictures from the other photographers who were on the trip. Also I am in search of a nice online slideshow that would be easy to use and will give me no problems in attaching it to this blog. (For those who really really want to see it now, well, we have to be friends in Facebook in order for you to see the pictures).

Meanwhile, I shall be busy writing away in the next few days. I have two deadlines to meet. First is that by July 28, I should be done writing 30 devotional articles on STRENGTH. Thanks to the project leader of this devotional team from the Philippines who graciously extended twice already for my sake. Second is that by July 31, I should submit my 15-page paper on the movement in the 19th century called the Cecilian Reform. I know I have been slacking big time... Hay naku! Prayers are needed that as I go into this season of writing and reflection, I will not only write for the sake of writing, but that the Holy Spirit guide me, teach me, and reform me as well as the other people who would come across it.

Signing off with a song in my heart:

"In everything, in everything, in everything give thanks! [2x]
In everything, everything, everything give thanks! [2x]
For this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you,
For this is the will of God, in everything give thanks!
In everything, in everything, in everything give thanks! [2x]
In everything, everything, everything give thanks! [2x]"

Ciao! Til the next blog post! (hopefully with more stories and pictures).

Flower Pots

2009-06-22T22:18:00.006-04:00

Okay. This has got to be the stupidest thing you would hear about me yet. More stupid than the someone else had to pay for my food in the cafe incident and the egg in my pocket incident.

What?! I didn't tell you about that egg? Ooooh. Maybe next time. Actually, that could be my stupidest feat ever, but anyway, my story this time is about these two raccoons.

Raccoons can be really cute when they are made into "stuffed toys", or probably when you watch them in cartoons. Yes, they are cute, as long as you keep your distance from them. I mean, aren't these the very animals that jump on people in comedies or something?

The dusk was gathering as I ride my bike home. I admit I was not really paying attention to what was on my way and was deep in thought about how good my day turned out. I did not notice that there were two big cats standing on Dr. Medina's driveway.

Cats? Well, that's how it looked like the first time I saw them. And I'm like, wait, these animals have tails that are too long for a cat. And cats don't stand on their two hind feet while holding something else with their other feet!

Yep, not only did it register slow for me, but it actually took me awhile to figure out that I was standing too close, and that these creatures are staring intently at me as well, ready to fight, whatever it was I planned to do.

The minute I realized that these were raccoons, I backed out of the driveway as fast as I could and drove away. I mean, those were healthy big raccoons. One almost looked guilty that I saw him holding Dr. Medina's water pot. And they didn't even budge at the sight of a human being!!!! Aren't they supposed to run or hide?!?

So there I was by the roadside trying to process my thoughts. It's getting darker. The mosquitos are killing me slowly. I checked my phone to call Eva or Naofumi. My phone is dead (as usual). I went to the Fil-Am church parking lot and made three rounds. I went back to the house and went by the other entrance, hoping that it could be open. Locked. I could ring the doorbell. Nah, that would mean that I had to see Aunty Loida. On any other day, that would be fine. But not today.

For the second time, I went to the roadside again to process more thoughts. I rode to Pioneer street, hoping that Eva would be in Dr. Pribis' house. No sign of Eva anywhere. I thought of stopping by at Mel's. But the thought of showing up on her doorstep and saying, "I'm here because there are two raccoons in Aunty Loida's driveway," is just too embarassing. I decided to go back to the house and try my luck again.

It was a hilarious sight. Me on a bike, at dark, riding around the neighborhood, while I was giving myself a pep talk. I believe I said "Face your fears, Irene" around 5-7 times. I was also telling God how cute the raccoons were but I don't really like to see them anywhere near me.

Finally, I get to driveway. Deep breath.

No sign of raccoons. But the scattered flower pots were evident signs that those two scoundrels have been into some mischief.

Whew!

However, the lights were still on in the kitchen. I would still have to talk to Aunty Loida after all.

Just as I pushed my key into the knob, the lights turned off.

I breathed another sigh of relief.

Thank God for raccoons. :-)

The Merry Month of May...Falalalalalala!

2009-05-30T21:18:00.002-04:00

I am waiting for Shirley and Naofumi to finish cooking their special French fries while I'm writing this blog. It's a Saturday evening, and it is unusual that nothing is "happening", so we sit here, and eat, and laugh, and talk.

Anyway, I just realized how May really flew by so fast, and I am not sure if I accomplished anything at all... :-( Nevertheless, I would like to say that it was a pretty busy month because:

Even though classes were over, I had to finish grading for Dr. Doukhan's 100+ students, only to realize later that I had to do them all over again partly because of my stupidity (yes, I admit to that), and mostly because of D2L's inability to be more flexible in accommodating the intricacies of Dr. Doukhan's grading schemes. (*winks*)
I can work more hours now in the music library, and just recently, in the cafeteria. I know I can keep the job in the library to 40 hours, and get paid more. But the day seems to go so much slower in MMC, compared to any other place. And so, the variety that the cafeteria offers, is a good breather for me. Just last week, I catalogued several music scores for hours, then run afterwards to the caf to wash thousands of asparagus. That's the kind of variety I am aiming for!
The youth group of Michiana Fil-Am are "steeped" with activities like the medical missionary training, bible studies, outreach, socials, etc.
I have an overflow of papers to write and assignments from a class. For the first time, I applied for an incomplete because the spring semester was just really crazy. On top of that, I have the Great Controversy study guide to finish (hopefully before the week ends).
I am trying to expand and develop skills like:

Scrapbooking (which to my dismay, didn't really work well for me because the time that I need to put into it and the usability of the finished product doesn't satisfy. Yes, I will have something pretty to look at, but that doesn't suffice the load of hours I am required to put into it, not to mention the money I would invest into it). I am not trying to downplay who do scrapbooking, tho. I admire the scrapbooker's craftsmanship, creativity, originality, and patience. But I guess, it's not for me. On the other hand, online scrapbooking is something that I am very willing to invest into.
Sewing. For me, it is as creative as scrapbooking, it is not as expensive, and I can use the finished product saving me even more money! It's fast, it's usable, it's practical. So I highly recommend it!
Cooking. It's been awhile since I started venturing into it and I am happy to say that I am enjoying preparing meals that actually tastes good. Yeah, yeah, I admit that growing up, I spent more time practicing the piano than cooking. And that department was something that was dominated by my mom and mom alone. However, I was left without a choice, to cook for myself when I decided to live "independently". Experience indeed has become and still is, a good teacher.
Writing. Believe it or not, I have put off freelance writing for a looong time. I used to do it a lot in college, back when I wrote for the school paper, and back when I had writing classes every semester. I still write papers now--but it is highly technical, and it stresses me out more. I used to journal alot too, but academics just eats off too many "pleasures" in my life. :-) So every once in awhile, although I don't have much time, I try to blog, not because I fancy publishing details about my life, but because there is pleasure in writing like this. I thought I was a beached whale when it comes to this skill, but God has blessed me with an opportunity to use it for His glory, and so I am willing to write again. (Thanks Kuya Chee!)
Reading. I tried starting a non-textbook, and am making an impressive progress on it, thankfully.
Driving. I know. It's about time.
Voice. Yes, I am taking lessons again in exchange for playing the piano for someone. :-)

What June has in store for me, I don't know. But it's going to be exciting, for sure.

Summer Getaway...NOT!!!

2009-05-21T12:43:00.004-04:00

Someone asked me what I do in the music library especially in these summer hours when hardly anybody comes in. Well, here’s how my 6 hours everyday get filled up:

By CATALOGING SCORES and BOOKS (Stage 2–at least that’s where I think I am in the process)

The music library orders new books and scores every now and then. We also receive them as gifts from alumni and several people in the community. However, first priority goes to the newly ordered stuff for the reason that these books and scores are especially requested by the music faculty, part-time teachers, students, or in Mrs. Mack’s opinion, something we definitely need to update the collection.

Stage 1 is taken care of by Alice and John. Before the order is transferred to the James White Library, they look up OCLC records that will best match the order. That way, the ordering process speeds up and the cataloguing process is not as complicated.

So the orders arrive and they pile up on my shelf. Hence, Stage 2.

First thing I do is to review the order record that Alice and John or the order guy at James White Library used. I make sure that it exactly matches the item and that it is complete, accurate, and have a lot of library holdings. The latter means that the more library systems use a certain record, the better. Libraries I usually look out for in a certain record include the Library of Congress, Indiana University, Carnegie Library, etc. Most times, I use the record they have chosen, sometimes I don’t and would look up a record I prefer in the OCLC Connexion. Not because they chose a wrong record but because one never really knows what the best record to use until the item is right in our hands.

OCLC is an online world catalog database that connects libraries around the world. One can see in it millions of records on scores, books, CDs and LPs which is not only for music but for any field topic. It’s quite a laborious process to look up records upon records until one satisfies me. But I learn a lot of details that helps me when I do my own research.

When I find the record that I need, I then proceed to edit and do the authority work so the James White Library system can use it. This step in the process includes checking if it has the appropriate call numbers, making sure if the composer’s authority record exists in the JWL system to avoid any duplicates (this also entails checking whether the composer has died already so dates in the old records would match the new record), matching titles and providing authority record numbers for scores that have uniform titles, etc. Occasionally, some enhancements of the record needed to be done especially in scores that are of a collective nature–like for example, compilations. Each separate title would have to be included in the record, as well as the composer of each title. This takes quite a bit of time, but a very necessary one because this will make searches in the online system easier. Another form of enhancement would be to remove unnecessary non-English lines. For example: [Sonates (Saxophone et piano) arr. Partitions et parties.] when something like [Sonatas (Saxophone and piano), Arranged.] exists already.

Finally, I barcode the score, categorize it into either music (regular scores), mumin (miniature scores), and mumon (monuments; compilation of the complete works music of a certain composer). I then verify the record and save it to the online record system, ready for the next stage, where Mrs. Mack proofreads everything and puts it permanently into the James White Library database.

The score or the book is then transferred to Marissa. She binds them, if the cover is too soft, puts the call numbers on, stamps it with a special MMC ownership stamp, checks the record in the system if its useable, and then puts it on the cart, ready to be shelved!

Sometimes, the details get taxing, and so once in a while I do other odds and ends job like photocopying, shelf-reading (which in and of itself is still a detailed job), and of course, shelving.

I prefer it when a lot of patrons come borrowing or requesting for CDs and other stuff like helping them how to use the Online Catalog System or the machine to burn sound recordings. But then that mostly happens when the regular semester is in session.

In the meantime, here I am, working on a “graveyard shift”…while just outside the window, the beautiful sun smiles, the stately trees dance and sway, and the colorful flowers flirt in delight.

Can't Get Enough

2009-05-10T01:28:00.024-04:00

I admit it, I just can't get enough of spring. I guess it just makes me appreciate the greenery more because of the long months cooped up in snow. Anyway, the pictures I'm sharing in this blog are shots I have taken while working in Aunty Loida's yard last Friday. Hope you guys enjoy the pictures!

Which really reminds me of the song:

All things bright and beautiful,
All creatures great and small,
All things wise and wonderful:
The Lord God made them all.

Each little flower that opens,
Each little bird that sings,
He made their glowing colors,
He made their tiny wings.

The tall trees in the greenwood,
The meadows where we play,
The rushes by the water,
To gather every day.

He gave us eyes to see them,
And lips that we might tell
How great is God Almighty,
Who has made all things well.

Well. I guess except for this poor little bird I found on the chair...

Listography 1: On Pets

2009-05-07T01:59:00.005-04:00

I went to Barnes & Nobles the other day and found this book entitled Listography: Your Life in Lists. Being a list lover myself, I proceeded to buy one, only to realize that I needed to use the money instead to buy a gift for a friend. I am giving her this book instead (since she is a list lover herself), while I shall do my own lists in this blog and the next.

LIST PETS YOU'VE HAD AND THEIR NAMES (And as a bonus: Cause of Death)

1. Muning (Cat: She was stolen before I saw her die)
2. Rimsky (Cat: Also stolen before I saw her die)
3. Orlando (Fighterfish 1: Owner's negligence)
4. Bloom (Fighterfish 2: Missed Orlando so much. Yes, I blame her for dying.)

A short list, indeed.

Now you know I'm not much into pets. Not that I hate animals. I actually enjoy other people's pets, and according to experience, they enjoy my company as well. However, they should know that life is short and sweet if they live with me.

Several Things

2009-05-03T23:34:00.005-04:00

Felicitations to Graduates:

First off, I would like to congratulate my friends Max and Anwar for being the "first" ones in my batch to graduate. Two years of grad school! No more, no less! You guys are awesome. Thank you, gentlemen, for being great classmates and friends as well. Surely, your presence will be terribly missed!
I would also like to extend my congratulations to Zovee and Deborah. (Why are all the cool people graduating already??? Weather forecast: Less sunshine in Berrien Springs... :-(((( ) Well, whatever you girls end up doing after years of "torture" here in AU, may God's path be always the path you walk on.

Babysitting Technique:

One thing that never fails to work on AJ whenever I ask him to do something that he feels like he doesn't want to do (e.g. eat his food, or go to sleep) is that I threaten to kiss him

Summer Itinerary:

For the life of me, I already have a million things listed to do in the next four months. Here's a partial (tentative) list in a hopelessly random order:

Give my room a good, authentic, true-blue spring cleaning
Answer my GC study guide before the actual tour takes place.
Seriously organize the pile of class handouts I have accumulated over the last two years.
Take voice lessons! Yey!
Prepare for my organ recital.
Hold a monthly mini "music and worship" seminar with the Fil-Am youth group
Scrapbook (a hobby I am willing to learn for several reasons I'm trying to discover)
Learn more dishes to cook (a talent I am going to master to prove wrong those who make ridiculous statements that musicians cannot cook!)
Go on a survival camp. (Hmmmm..)
Go to Europe! (Yeah, baby!)
Actually, go to Canada before doing no. 10
Work, of course. Duh!
Finish writing my paper on the revival of sacred music in the 19th century, specifically on the influences brought about by the Cecilians.
Workout. Haha. :-) Honest.
Get a haircut. (This should be on top of the list!)
Finish reading Prophets and Kings.
More time for personal and group Bible studies!

Sincerest apologies:

It is not good to end this entry on such a bad note, but what's even worse is that as I am writing this blog, I realized that I have committed a grave mistake. All because I am so featherbrained and disorganized. I am deeply sorry for booking an appointment that I failed to go to today. I totally forgot and that is simply unexcusable! I should really ask God to make me more organized. Oh my. I just lost a hundred bucks, but more importantly, a creditable image. :-(

Elijah's Ravens

2009-04-29T06:52:00.008-04:00

"And Elijah the Tishbite, of the inhabitants of Gilead, said to Ahab, “As the LORD God of Israel lives, before whom I stand, there shall not be dew nor rain these years, except at my word.”
Then the word of the LORD came to him, saying, “Get away from here and turn eastward, and hide by the Brook Cherith, which flows into the Jordan. And it will be that you shall drink from the brook, and I have commanded the ravens to feed you there.” So he went and did according to the word of the LORD, for he went and stayed by the Brook Cherith, which flows into the Jordan. The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning, and bread and meat in the evening; and he drank from the brook. 1 Kings 17:1-6

I opened the refrigerator in disgust. Frozen bread from last month, apple pie from last week, corn and refried beans from three weeks ago, some carrots, and calamansi juice from last year. I opened the cupboards and most of what I can cook required more time than what I have in my hands.

Food! Food! Food! My mind and my stomach was screaming at the top of their soundless voices throughout the day. It's one thing to fast, but it's another thing to be hungry--really hungry--while not of one's choice to be so. However, I refuse to spend money to buy something from the cafeteria. (Just last week, I braved myself in buying something from there, and my debit card refused to work. I didn't have anything with me except some spare cash that I had to count painstakingly and embarrasingly to be able to pay up. I didn't have enough, and this time, no angel offered to pay for me, so I ended returning some of the 'returnable stuff I took. Yay.)

Later during the day...

Dr. Cerna invited my roomate and I (or me and my roomate?? I'm not sure which one is gramatically correct anymore. Oh well.) Anyway, so she invited us for dinner and it was a feast of wonderful vegan food to my heart's content.

Of course, "take home" was inevitable.

Unbeknownst to my knowledge, during the day, a lady from the church visited the house. Luckily, my roomate, Eva, decided to stay home to study. To her surpise (and mine, when she related the story to me), this lady came with loads of groceries. According to her, she was impressed to stop by and bring us food. She even came with homemade frozen dinners (ready to heat..in case we don't have enough time in our hands to cook).

The next day, another lady from the church gave us a big carton of yogurt.

The next days that followed consisted of invitations for dinner, my boss bringing lunch for everyone at work, birthday parties, and just last night, Aunty Loida bought us some apples and oranges.

“Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature" Matthew 6:25-27

Passion Play

2009-04-23T08:08:00.006-04:00

The Passion Play pictures for this year are already up! This was the first time I've seen a passion play of this sort. I've seen more of this stuff, but grossly portrayed, and theologically questionable. Go to the Philippines on the passion weekend and you'll know what I'm talking about.

Anyway, except for the contemporary (almost rock) music they played during resurrection, everything was well-played, and I am personally blessed.

So, here are some pictures from the play. The Jesus' role was played by several students representing different nationalities. Several pictures I'm posting are Naofumi's shots as a Japanese Jesus. Naofumi is a seminary student here in Andrews as well as one of the leaders of our youth group, mainly in-charge for campus ministries. For MORE pictures, click here.

For a good, highly recommended read, Click here !

Invisibility Explained

2009-04-21T20:36:00.005-04:00

To those of you who are wondering why I suddenly "disappeared" from Facebook, why I don't reply to emails, and why I am hardly online, here are some of my reasons:

My "disappearing" act from Facebook was a way to resuscitate myself from the drowning tide of course work. It was a very great temptation to go online and check out bits and pieces of life from other people while I was crumbling into bits and pieces myself. I finally came to the realization that the tempatation had to be "plucked out". However, rumors say that I will be back in Facebook by May.
The accusation that I am hardly online is completely false! I am online almost all of the time but unfortunately, not to answer emails, nor chat (although I have been craving to do that!), but to work! Dr. Doukhan decided to go paperless on her numberless assignments and exams, and used D2L instead. This gave me a very flexible schedule to work, but it minimized my leisure use of the internet. (So sad)
When I do use the internet for my own personal benefit, I spend it listening to audioverse or...blogging. :-)
I don't reply to emails??? I do!!! Uhhh...it just depends on how urgent my response is needed.
I had no Internet connection for almost three weeks!

Well, I'm counting the days until I finish grading all of Dr. Doukhan's classes, until I have taken all my final exams (which is next week!), until I finish writing my paper...then and only then will I lurk visibly in cyberspace. Until then, this blog should suffice for a proof of my existence!

Reading Ouevre

2009-04-19T23:25:00.003-04:00

Just before the 2009 spring semester says it's final goodbye, I would like to list the books that kept me company for the whole four months, and of course, the books I am looking forward to reading for this summer!

Finished Reading:

Music in Western Civilization by Craig Wright and Bryan Simms (This is probably one of the most student-friendly music history textbook that I've read so far. Not only did I read it from cover to cover, but answered every single study guide and made variants of it.)
Exploring Research in Music Education and Music Therapy by Kenneth Phillips
Romantic Music: A History of Musical Style in 19th-century Europe by Leon Plantinga
Strunk's Resource Readings in Music History: The 19th Century

Currently Reading:

The Holy Bible (of course!)
Prophets and Kings (I read this for devotional together with the Bible)
Ellen G. White Comments (I bought a separate book because my Bible doesn't include one)
Ellen White and Music: Background and Principles by Paul Hamel (It's really interesting to read this at the same time I was studying secular music on the same era EWhite was living in, kind of like a comparative study of sorts.)
Creeping Compromise by Joe Crews

Looking Forward to Reading... (in the very near future!)

Weimar Institute's NEWSTART Lifestyle Cookbook (I may start on this next month and actually do the "practical application" because I have more time!)
Acts of the Apostles
Here We Stand compiled by Dr. Samuel Pipim

I would probably add more to the future books I would read. Right now, I just need to finish my current ones before I dream of more stuff to delve into!

Prayer

2009-04-14T18:45:00.008-04:00

It seems that throughout the whole day, I find myself singing this song over and over. I love Mark Hayes' simple use of words, yet very dynamic and meaningful in thought:

Prayer of Being

Be in my my life
Be in my breath
Be in my walk
Be in my rest
Be in this humble heart of mine
Be ever present in my mind
Be in my hands
Be in my feet
Be in my eyes
and in my speech
Be in the smile I give away
Be in each healing word I say
Be in my work
Be in my play
Be in the struggles of each day
Be in my joy
Be in my pain
Be in my loss
Be in my gain
Be in my thoughts
Be in my song
Be in my spirit all day long
Be in my prayers at dawn's first light
Be in my dreams all through the night
Amen
The prayer of my heart forever shall be
I in You and You in me!

Now and Awhile Ago

2009-04-11T23:05:00.006-04:00

Blessed.
---
Sleepy.
---
Blessed!!!
---
Still sleepy...
---
Hopeful.
---
Hmm...more like wishful...
---
Grateful.
---
Expecting a miracle.
---
Still sleeppppppyyyy!!!
---
Tired.
---
Mortified! Owww!
---
Concentrated. Wahahah!
---
Surprised.
---
Embarassed...yay.
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Really blessed!
---
--
-
.

Quick Quiz

2009-04-07T14:57:00.005-04:00

1. Look at the picture above. Do you think I made it?

a. No way! That's not possible!
b. Hmmm...I'm not so sure about that.
c. I don't think so. It probably doesn't taste good anyway.
d. Not convinced, but hey, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt!
e. Sure! You're the best!

2. If you think I cooked it, what would probably be the reason?

a. L-O-V-E is the answer.
b. Just trying to impress someone...a guy, maybe.
c. Someone woke me up with a gun in hand and forced me to cook
d. I am invited to BAD COOKS ANONYMOUS
e. Hey, why not?!

I would be interested to know your answers! :-)

The Evolution of the Apple

2009-04-06T19:10:00.005-04:00

Today was literally spent in front of the computer. Baaaad!!!

I got good reason to do so. I am preparing a presentation on Cecilianism and I have never come across a lot of reading stuff regarding Catholic music until today. Shame. I should read more. But this paper is a good jumpstart, so I'm really excited. Yet, what a lot of work to do for a 15-minute presentation. (Sigh).

Well, I didn't get all of it done and I have one day left. Luckily, Mr. Mitchell cancelled class tomorrow. I can put my nose in front of the screen all morning again as I noodle on more Catholic music stuff.

But how famished I am! (Yet very unwilling to spend a cent on anything!)

I tried to rummage around the MMC to see what I can get.

Lo and behold! A fat green apple was sitting royally on John's shelf! Talk about luck!

Suddently, I had a distinct remembrance of John telling me before that I could eat that green apple if I wanted to. Nope, I'm not hallucinating. The thing is, he told me that a month ago, and the apple is still there. Quite a bit lonely for the apple to be sitting there for so long, I should say, especially now that I remember it's been there for a month.

My stomach growled in impatience.

I tried to examine the apple. Hmmmm...no brown spots yet. No soft spots either. It's green luster is more of a matte green, however.

Oh well. One apple won't kill me. (Does that sound familiar or what?!?)

So into my fangs..errr..my shiny, white teeth...err...the apple go.

Hmmm...

....

I could almost, possibly bet on my laptop that it tasted like guavas from the Philippines!

Isn't that cool or what?! :-))

Thoughts for the Fish

2009-03-31T08:47:00.002-04:00

Lately, I'm finding myself in places that conjure bittersweet memories. You know how you come to a certain place and memories suddenly rush into your mind like it was just yesterday. A torture, indeed, but an inevitable part of the "healing" process.

Some people say, don't go to places that will haunt you with painful memories.

I say, go, go, go to those places! Not because I am some psychotic, "self-inflictor" of pain kind of person, but because I believe in the healing power of "rubbing salt on the wound."

Yes, all those memories will come to me; flashbacks of instances that will make me remember all the happy used-to's. Yes, they are gone. Past. Yesterday. Nothing but a memory. Goodbyes have been said. Backs have been turned. And cliche as it may sound, but a new chapter begins.

When memories like these come to me, I would try to look at them with fondness. I could choose to be bitter. Blame the other person. Blame the moment. Blame the cosmos. Blame me. Then what?! I say look at things with fondness, and pronounce, it was great while it lasted, BUT, I need to move on.

I was talking to a friend two weeks ago and we were trying to mark the difference between "moving on" and "letting go". It's the same for me. Both are levels of the acceptance stage. One lets go and then moves on. Both are dependent of each other. One cannot move on if he/she hasn't let go. My friend wouldn't be convinced. For him, both are separate actions and does not necessarily depend on each other. Oh well. That is his opinion. He has a different set of experiences, and I have my own.

Come to think of it, while I'm having that "it's-all-coming-back-to-me" moment, I begin to realize how to NOT do it again, how to know what kinds of person to avoid (and so many other AHA! insights). Hence, I go to those places not to purposefully recollect things of the past, but to replace them instead with even better experiences and more meaningful moments.

AUP AMBASSADORS in World Choir Championships 2009

2009-03-20T14:18:00.003-04:00

The AUP Ambassadors is set to participate at the 1st World Choir Championships, to be held in the Gyeongnam Province in the Republic of Korea. The event will take place on July 7-17, 2009 and will feature three competitions, namely, the Korean International Open Competition, the 2nd Asian Choir Games, and the 1st Grand Prix of Choral Music. Winners of the Korean International Open Competition and the Asian Choir Games will then have the opportunity to compete against each other in the Grand Prix of Choral Music.

The AUP Ambassadors, having been a previous winner at the 4th World Choir Games in Xiamen, China in 2006, and ranked 28th in Musica Mundi’s world rankings, is already qualified for the 1st Grand Prix of Choral Music.

Because of the generosity of the alumni during the Ambassadors 2008 US Concert Tour, funds left over after the tour will now be used to cover the competition and board and lodging fees while in Korea.

In this regard, the AUP Ambassadors would like to appeal for the help of the alumni in raising funds for their travel expenses, specifically the airfare for a group of 30 persons. The group needs $500 for each person.

Donors may make out cheques or money orders to: “AUP Ambassadors and Friends Inc.” or simply to “AUP Ambassadors.” This account DOES NOT have a non-profit status yet, so we will not be able to issue tax-deductible receipts. In spite of this, we appeal for your help in this exciting undertaking, and trust that you will once again support your Ambassadors as they take to the international choral stage for the second time. CD’s of the Ambassadors’ latest recording, “We Sing As One,” will also be made available to those donating $20 and more.

For contact details, email me at gavas@andrews.edu!

Change of Plans

2009-03-18T21:42:00.005-04:00

I was planning to

...write a different entry.

...record all the interesting conversations I had with people today.

...reserve that idea for next time, but I am not so sure. (Depends on who I talk to!)

...read journal assignments for Week 12 of my MUHL 524 class.

...read some D2L music journals from some of Doukhan's 100-plus students

...clean the yard.

...cook for tomorrow.

...email Tim (maybe later!)

...sort my tax papers (ugh!)

...sleep earlier.

BUT!!!! Instead I

...read Jennifer's email

...realized I'm missing out on some great stuff come March 26-30 (but for a good reason!)

...stumbled upon a treasure chest of online resources about Worship and Music

...can't stop browsing on all these wonderful sites!!!!!

AND, now I am

...am affirmed, refreshed, and inspired of my convictions to be a music minister.

...EXCITED! :-)

...really, really, excited.

Just Trust!

2009-03-13T18:11:00.003-04:00

In a few hours, the sun will set and Sabbath officially starts. Despite the frantic pace of my schedule today, I am happy that I am able to sit down, and just welcome the Sabbath as the golden rays of sunlight slowly fades.

It had been a good day, but let me tell you how it happened...

I woke up later than usual (having been kept up all night keeping Eva company as she gets ready to leave for Tennessee...ahhh, Tennessee, wonderful memories!) thinking that I don't need to get to the AU campus until 11am when I have to work.

To start my day right, I began meditating through Jeremiah 16 and 17. I usually read EGW's Prophets and Kings for devotionals, but having come across the chapter about Jeremiah, I decided I would read through the book of Jeremiah itself to get a better idea of what she is talking about. I admit, I didn't really know much about him, except that he was one of those major prophets who was single and was always weeping (at least that's what Bible Games always identify him with). But the Holy Spirit has revealed so much in the past few days! While there are so many things to learn from it, one major point really made an impact on me. Years ago when I first read Jeremiah, it sounded like God is the ultimate punisher. However, reading it again now, I get a glimpse of how great and wonderful of a lover God really is. I cannot fathom how God would keep wooing His people, the Israelites, to come back to Him, and that no matter how bad they've done, once they repent, God will take them back and give them what was taken away from them. It's always the same story, yet I always see how forgiving and merciful God really is. And for me, it was really a very comforting blessing, especially at this very trying time of my life.

Right after saying my prayers, a clear reminder crossed my thoughts: I need to be in AU by 9:30am! I completely forgot that I have a meeting with Dr. Doukhan to talk about my presentation for her class. The clock read 8am, and you may think that it is not late. But the meeting required that I need to present an outline with a complete bibliography. I had my outline ready, but alas, all I have of my references are call numbers of the books and accession numbers of articles that I plan to use. Thankfully, the library system is easily accessible online and all I needed was to type the call numbers, cut and paste citation infos, edit them in Turabian style, and I was ready to go. I was out the door by 9:20am.

Now, I may be used to walking. But walking from Kephart Lane to AU in 10 minutes is really quite impossible for me. Back when I still lived in Maplewood Dr., I can risk leaving the house 5 minutes before class, of course via the shortcut, or by occasional hitchhiking. But not this time. I spent a good 20 minutes walking, worrying, and chastising myself for getting up late, for leaving my bike in Jelene's apartment, and a hundred other things to make my mood go sour.

Turned out, Dr. Doukhan was late herself and I had to wait another 10 minutes for her to come.

My presentation was approved without much ado. I have spent days just getting that outline right and the research I've done (although not very futile) in the process proved to be rewarding. I will be talking about the revival of sacred music during the 19th century. It was a big movement especially this time when majority of the composers were on mysticism and spiritualism and was just trying to get away from the norms of the church. Anyway, I'm not going to talk about the whole thing here. But it looks like the next remaining weeks of school will be spent writing and reading about this stuff. And it's exciting because it can give a good headstart for my Master's project paper.

And then I found out that there is a big chance that I will not be Dr. Doukhan's teaching assistant anymore the next fall semester. Apparently, grad assistantships last only for two years, and this is my 2nd year. Just when I have prepared the material for all her review sessions and got the D2L website figured out, I am going to be replaced. However, that is still unsure. She told me that she still wants me to have the job, and would insist that I keep it for one more year. Yet the condition was, if a new grad student applies, passes the history placement exam, and is not a conducting major, then that would ensure my replacement...which I will know until first day of class.

Then, another surprise was that Kuya Allen backed out of the fundraising concert slated for the next weekend. Posters have already been put up and invitations were already distributed. But it was something beyond our control so there was really nothing we can do but give it up. And maybe give another try, if time permits.

I was counting on the grad assistantship and the fundraised money to sail me through the next few months, but it was clear to me that all of them are being taken away. I then begin to doubt my plans for the future. Does God not want me to proceed or are these mere tests to allow me to grow spiritually? Ironically, sometimes I cannot tell the difference.

I was walking listlessly across the campus, wondering what kind of answer does God have for my question when suddenly, a plethora of songs ran into my head. "Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus..." "His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me..." "I must tell Jesus all of my trials, I cannot bear these burdens alone..." "What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear..." One after the other, songs of comfort rushed into my head, and I was able to sing all them without fumbling at the lyrics. By the time I finished singing, my aimless wondering found me standing right in front of the Administration building.

Go in and talk to the payroll person. Tell him to forward your March salary to your bank instead of your Andrews account.

Huh?! But is that possible? I need that money for my tuition.

Just go in and talk to the guy in-charge.

Ok! Whatever you say!

A few minutes after talking to Kuya Willy, the payroll guy, I was allowed to have two paychecks forwarded to my bank.

Now go and ask the health insurance personnel. Ask them about the conditions of your medical insurance.

But Lord, I know it already. People have told me about it. I know I don't have insurance for the summer, and that I would have to pay more money. I know that my insurance doesn't cover trips outside the country, so I don't have to ask! Besides, I'm late for work!

Just go and ask!

A few minutes after talking to Miss Baptiste, I find out that my insurance covers me until August, and is valid and applicable even when I go to another country. They gave me the necessary papers I would need to show to the consulate, and I didn't have to pay for anything!

Where to now, Lord? I asked sheepishly.

Get an application form at the cafeteria.

What?! Does that mean I'm not getting the assistantship?

Just go!

And so I get the forms and rushed to my work. Now I still don't have any idea why I needed to do all those but God is brewing something. He's got it all made, and I know, stubborn as I am sometimes, that I just have to obey Him, even though it may not seem to make sense.

Life in Colors

2009-03-05T23:04:00.006-05:00

I am a big fan of pictures. I like looking at photo albums, picture books, Flickr and the like. Not very long ago, a friend recommended the National Geographic website where they have a whole photography section full of really awesome shots. Every now and then, they would feature a picture series, and one series I particularly liked was "Life in Colors". Here are some of my top favorites:

Life in red

A red car sits on a dirty and deserted side street in communist East Berlin. East and West Germany were reunited in 1990 after 45 years of separation following the end of World War II.

A Maryland maple tree shows off the flaming foliage beloved by "leaf-peepers." Experts say most people judge the quality of each autumn's foliage by the prevalence of red leaves.

Sumac leaves glow red in the autumn light at the Tallgrass Prairie National Preserve in Cottonwood Falls, Kansas. The grassy prairie landscape is dotted with shrub thickets of sumac and dogwood, which are favored by birds and small animals.

Darkness lends a reddish tint to sea oats bending with storm-whipped winds in Saxis, Virginia. The salt-loving tall grass thrives in beach ecosystems and helps to form and protect sand dunes by collecting windblown grains.

Nothing can dampen the enthusiasm of Taipei schoolchildren gathered for a celebration of Double Ten, Taiwan's national day. Double Ten remembers the October 10, 1911, revolution that ended China’s last dynasty.

Life in blue

A group of chinstrap penguins lines the edge of an iceberg adrift in Antarctic waters. Chinstraps are among the most abundant penguins, and some colonies live on floating icebergs.

Though it's better known for shades of red, the Grand Canyon is shrouded in blue as night descends on its foggy, snow-covered walls. The canyon's north rim is typically closed to vehicles in winter.

These distinctive webbed feet belong to a blue-footed booby of the Galápagos Islands. The bluer, the better: Courting males show off with a high-stepping strut—and those with brighter feet are more attractive to potential mates.

The massive bulk of Garibaldi Glacier slowly spills into Garibaldi Fjord in Tierra del Fuego—the archipelago at the southern tip of South America. The aquatic endpoint of such a glacier is known as a terminus.

A homey-looking igloo lights up the stark landscape on a cold night in the Canadian Arctic. These temporary shelters were commonly used by indigenous peoples in the frigid North American Arctic.

Unveiling the regalia that has captivated humans (and hens) for thousands of years, an Indian peacock displays his colorful train at an Australian reserve. Males may use their feathers to attract harems of several hens.

Life in green

In a nocturnal rendezvous, two green tree frogs meet face-to-face atop a leaf in Louisiana's Atchafalaya River Delta. Green may be the most common color found in nature—it's everywhere from leaves, grass, and moss to snakes, butterflies, and even the northern lights. Green represents life, vitality, nature, and, of course, environmentalism.

The northern lights, or aurora borealis, produce a brilliant display in the skies near Yellowknife, Northwest Territories, Canada. The phenomenon is produced by the action of solar wind on the atmosphere at Earth's Poles.

Leaf-green pierid butterflies alight on the sandy shores of the Tuichi River in Bolivia's Madidi National Park. The vast Madidi wilderness encompasses a staggering range of ecosystems—from snowcapped Andean peaks to tropical Amazonian lowlands.

A Japanese tea farmer picks leaves in a verdant field in central Japan's mountainous Nara Prefecture. Tea has a long history in Japan but was first brought to the islands from China.

A vibrant green snail is well camouflaged on a large leaf in the Borneo rain forest. Vast, isolated forests here house enormous ecological riches but face widespread deforestation.

A rare white alligator swims at the Audubon Zoo in New Orleans. Albino gators are ill suited for life in the wild because their pale skin offers little protection from the sun.

Life in yellow

Yellow-necked caterpillars crowd a thin branch on a cherry tree in Frederick, Maryland. Infestations of these caterpillars may defoliate oaks and other hardwood trees but usually do no permanent damage.

A blanket of fallen maple leaves covers the ground with gold during autumn in Washington, D.C. The visual "quality" of each fall's foliage is determined by weather conditions such as moisture and temperature.

A staircase stands in sharp relief against a wall of yellow stained glass at the University of Colorado in Boulder.

Yellow beach umbrellas line the sands at a hotel on Phuket Island, Thailand. The island draws many foreign tourists to its balmy climes, crystal-clear waters, and Thai hospitality.

Life in purple

Journey's end meets day's end as a freighter delivers its cargo to a Potomac River dock in Alexandria, Virginia. The historic riverside town is a stone's throw from the nation's capital.

Purple is a versatile color. Combining the fire of red with the serenity of blue, it has the ability to soothe as well as excite passion. Purple is prevalent in nature in everything from eggplants to amethysts, and humans have adopted it as a symbol of royalty.

Here, Ross Bridge in Tasmania is cloaked in a mauve sunset. The beautiful sandstone span, built by convicts in 1836, is one of Australia's oldest and is decorated with an impressive array of carvings.

Two polar bears spar in the snow as a magenta sunset descends over Churchill, Manitoba, Canada. Scientists fear that the shifting Arctic climate could threaten the species' survival.

A Joshua tree stands under a purple-black sky in California’s Mojave Desert. Native Americans once wove baskets and sandals from this tree's leaves and ate its buds and seeds.

A close-up shows purple violets flecked with bright yellow pollen in Washington, D.C. Violet is the common name for this plant genus, but they are more properly called violas.

Life in brown

A chocolatier uses decorative accents to create a sweet that pleases both the eye and the palate. These gourmet chocolates are from Godiva Chocolatiers in Brussels, Belgium.

A bird-shaped formation of flamingos pops in bright pink from the muddy waters of a placid lagoon in Mexico's Yucatán Peninsula, along the coast of the Gulf of Mexico.

Palm trees emerge from the morning mist in the Pantanal near Mato Grosso do Sul, Brazil. This enormous landlocked river delta forms an ecologically diverse wetland ecosystem in parts of Brazil, Bolivia, and Paraguay.

Natural and earthy, brown's warm tones are familiar in nature—think of rough tree bark, fluid mudflows, and dense animal fur, like that of the Kodiak bear pictured below. The color, which represents wholesomeness and earthiness.

A curling fern leaflet provides the perfect cover for a camouflaged brown geometrid caterpillar. This Hawaiian caterpillar disguises itself in order to lie in wait and hunt unsuspecting insects by ambush.

A group of storks gathers to forage on a muddy Costa Rican riverbed. The Tempisque River Basin showcases many of Costa Rica’s diverse ecosystems, from high-altitude cloud forests to lowland swamps and marshes.

Life in orange

The moon rises over Big Meadows on an autumn evening in Virginia's Shenandoah National Park. Some 450 families in the Blue Ridge Mountains were relocated when the park was created in the 1930s.

Birds fill an orange sky over Germany’s Wattenmeer National Park. This coastal wetland, covered by the sea at high tide, is home to some 3,200 different animals and a popular stopover for many migratory birds.

The pastel-orange of the Grand Canyon's sandstone walls dominates the view from the vantage known as SB Point. The canyon’s rock layers display a geological history some two billion years old.

A balance of playful yellow and passionate red, orange commands attention without overwhelming. This often flamboyant color brings to mind citrus and sunsets, fall leaves, and jack-o'-lanterns. Orange has even been found to stimulate appetite and creativity in humans.

Here, three giraffes in Botswana's Okavango Delta stretch their necks above the horizon before a glowing orange sky.

An orange-tinged sunset provides the backdrop for a sailboat on Lake Michigan. This 321-mile-long (517-kilometer-long) body of water is the only Great Lake located entirely within the United States.

An extreme close-up shows the delicate hair of an orange baboon tarantula, a resident of the Great Plains Zoo in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. This large, aggressive species is native to Africa.

Vibrant tulips brighten the Samuels Bulb Garden at St. Louis's Missouri Botanical Garden. Established in 1859, the garden is an internationally recognized center for botanical research and a year-round urban oasis for flower fans.

A burning orange sun sets behind a fringe of pampas grass in Japan. Japan's nickname, "The Land of the Rising Sun," is derived from the Chinese ideograph meaning "place of the sun's origin."

For more pictures, see this! Hope you enjoy as much as I did!

Sporadically speaking...

2009-03-04T20:50:00.008-05:00

I just realized, I need to learn German so bad! The realization hit me minutes ago when after hours of futile searching, I have not come up with more than two English academic journals for my research topic, while a plethora of German articles spring up in RILM, SAGEOnline, JSTOR, ProQuest, etc. Come to think of it, learning German in one week is an impossible feat (I need to come up with a nice, long bibliography a week from now). Although, to learn German is in my list of lifetime to-dos, it certainly is unattainable within seven days. Unless, I have a fluent German-speaking companion who will be with me 12/7. Then, probably, it would not be so inconceivable. (*winks*).

Anyway, enough of Germans..errrr..the German language.
--------------------------

So I moved again. Goodbye Maplewood Drive. :-(

Whew! It was a full six months of worrying over electricity, gas, laundry, water, rent, internet, housemates, unwashed dishes, trash, clogging bath tub, heat, cat urine smell, mice, and men (yes, they do come in that order!). I don't mean to say tho that it was all bad. Actually, I think those things I worried over really had to happen so that I would appreciate better what I had before and what I have now.

Of the hundred "what if nots" I ask myself in moving there, I can come up with one good solid conclusion, to learn hard lessons in life so that I can become a better person.

Some of the few of the things I learned:

1. Save gas, electricity, water and money with a consciousness like never before. Not even when I was in the Philippines did I have that consciousness to conserve.
2. Cook good vegetarian food in the least amount of time. Hmmm, you know what? Number two should actually be...I learned how to cook!!! Praise the Lord! I still have a long way to go, but at least I can bring stuff at potlucks, and feel no shame whatsoever at what I bring. :-)
3. I discovered a good shortcut to Andrews University and to Apple Valley. This is for people who go places by WALKING only! And I am definitely an avid walker. (Not that I have any choice).
4. Share time with others. I have the habit of being a hobbit. A lot of times I feel like 24 hours is not enough and that I have to use all these precious hours to myself---to study, to practice, to do whatever, as long as I spend it for myself. But because I had to deal with six other girls in the house, I learned that although it is good for me to be doing my own business, doing it all the time is time wasted.

Suffices to say, I sorely miss Deborah, Tracy and Helen. If only I can carry them with me, then moving away wouldn't be so bad.
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So I got a new stuff...

1. new address
2. new laptop (finally!)
3. new perspectives in life

Yey! I feel like the new year just started. Well, it is no news, that I am the perennial late bloomer.
----------------------------------
Two good looking guys showed up at our doorstep this past Saturday morning looking for Eva. Apparently, the free Bible request form I had filled up with Eva's contact info when I was in Arizona two months ago resulted into a Bible study offer from these two guys. I told them they could come back after we get back from church. They said they cannot. I offered to make an appointment the next day. They said they would be in church. Well, then the next time they come, they would have to deal with Helen.
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Don't you just love policemen in the Philippines? While I am in no position to publicly comment about this, it would probably be safe to say that at this day and age, loving your neighbor as yourself can be the hardest thing to do at at times (especially when some of them are soooo unloveable), but it is something we all need to do everyday.
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Well, I have to go back to my quest for Non-German articles. Hopefully, I don't run into French ones...

Only Just Beginning

2009-02-23T15:48:00.006-05:00

Just when I thought that the concertizing days would be over and that my money-making 'schemes' (at the positive sense of the word) would stop on Valentine's Day weekend, I was to realize that I was grossly mistaken. Because the concert proved to be a blessing, not only financially for me (as was intended in the first place), the people who went there were so blessed that another concert is booked for a repeat performance.

That the four of us (Allen, Deborah and Love) are looking forward to more concerts is quite exciting to plan for. The very unselfish hearts of my friends who are putting in their time and efforts are simply priceless, and I realize that the only thing I can ever do is to return the same favor.

However, setting the monetary gain aside, I would like to thank God for using me this way to bless others. That's why I honestly think that I don't have complete ownership of my musical talents (nor anything that I am, really). I am not a complete virtuoso, but indeed, a lot of my humbling experiences came about because of music (quite a story to tell but not this time), and God in His patience seem to teach me that lesson, over and over again.

May anyone who read this serve as another witness, that I vow to use my musical talents (and all other hidden talents that I might possess) only for the glory of God!

Beatles for the Bored

2009-02-19T12:39:00.002-05:00

One boring morning in the Music Library...

Nina: Find this book for me, MelCat needs it, and I can't find it.

Me: Where were you searching?

Nina: Everywhere!!! I think it's misshelved.

Me: Knock, knock.

Nina: What?!

Me: Misshelved!

Nina: What are you talking about?!

Me: Misshelved, ma belle. These are words that go together well, My Misshelved. Misshelved, ma belle. Sont des mots qui vont très bien ensemble, Très bien ensemble.

LOL...ok, you can shoot me now.

An Awesome Valentine Weekend!

2009-02-16T23:12:00.024-05:00

I never miss a February 14 blog, and so although I am at my wit's end trying to have my schoolwork ready before my "official" week starts (fortunately, I don't have to work nor go to school on Mondays, thus, every weekend is a long weekend!), I will share. Besides, the weekend has been blissfully wonderful to not share it.

This weekend was slated for me to have the back-to-back fundraising concert at Fil-Am SDA Church and the Riverview Park Christian Church. And although it was really stressful to singlehandedly prepare all concert tickets, posters, sponsorship/solicitation letters, programs, correspondences, and practice for it at the same time, I should say it was an effort worth the while. My heart goes out to Dr. Medina and the other Fil-Am aunties for advising me what to do, as well as the other performers, Kuya Allen, Eva, and Deborah, for selflessly sharing their talents even though they would rather go out on dates or do something else on a Saturday night, let alone a Valentine's Day evening. I would like to thank Michael and Tracy for supervising the laptop and keeping my relatives company while they watch thru Skype. Although the laptop microphone was not working (as we discovered later on several minutes after the concert), at least they were able to see us go through the motions. I thank the audience who, although the ticket was only for $5.00 dollars, gave more. Above all I thank GOD, because he used this concert to bless people, not just me, but to all those who were touched by the music and the Scriptures. Both churches wanted to book a repeat performance, and hopefully, my co-performers would be willing to do it all over again.

Then, what's a Valentine's Day without greeting my mom a Happy Birthday at the same time?!?

Ok, so the next story I will share will probably make me sound like I am a crazy schoolgirl with a hopeless crush on someone. It's alright. I think, I need this kind of craziness sometimes to spice up my too serious life. And I digress, today marked my calendar for the King's Singers at HPAC. What I hoped to be just a nice evening of very good music turned out to be kakakilig. I normally am not a sucker for autograph-signing after concerts, but tonight was one of those nights I had to take pictures and autographs from each one of them, especially the newest member of the group, Timothy Wayne-Wright. So this new guy was signing my album, and he was like, "I was looking at you during the concert. It was you who's sitting at the side right? You were straight across from me." And I'm like, "Uhh, yeah..." and was able to contain to myself, thankfully, a very flashy grin. "You were singing along half the time. So I trust that you enjoyed the concert." And I thought all the time during the concert that I was just imagining him to be looking straight at me. Ahhhhh, please, can someone catch me now?!?

Told you, it is schoolgirl material. Nevertheless.

Aside from that, they sang Blackbird as an encore. Woohoo!!!!!!!

You Are Invited!

2009-02-09T11:48:00.004-05:00

For more details: E-mail me at gavas@andrews.edu

Soli Deo Gloria!

2009-02-02T08:39:00.003-05:00

Guess what I found in my mail the other day...

Dear Ms. Gavas,

It is my privilege to inform you that you have been nominated for membership in the Honor Society of Phi Kappa Phi, the nation's oldest and most selective all-discipline honor society. Congratulations on this crowning achievement! Standards for election to Phi Kappa Phi are extremely high and membership is by invitation only. Your invitation to join Phi Kappa Phi is a testament to your hard work and superior scholarship.

Let me be the first to congratulate you for being selected to join the Honor Society of Phi Kappa Phi. This is the highest nationally ranked tribute that Andrews can bestow you. I look forward to seeing you at the initiation banquet and program.

Sincerely,

Cynthia Helms, President
Andrews University Chapter of Phi Kappa Phi

Do it Pinoy Style

2009-01-28T08:49:00.007-05:00

It seems that every week poses a different kind of challenge for me, and that if I am not able to rise above the challenge, it piles up into the next week until I sink into despondency and discouragement.

Such has been the month of January. Every week is a challenge, yet parts of it cling to me to be carried on to the next week -- to rise from, or to sink into, the choice is mine.

This week's challenge for me had to be the fundraiser I am organizing. It has exhausted my precious study hours (thankfully, not practice hours yet!), and yet the more I do about it, the more it looks discouraging and unsuccessful. On top of that, I have $13.95 on my bank account, rent and utilities due this week, etc (yes, that sounds little compared to others, nonetheless, it worries me so). And as a cherry on top of this unseeming predicament, we had a bit of a flood in the house last night..

For days, the only water that we were having was scalding hot and the only place that provided cold water was the bathroom sink. The dishes remained unwashed, accumulating to five days worth of meals and cooking, and yes, we had to skip taking showers, too (Eww! Gross!), and clothes were piling high in the corner of the room. I finally decided to go Pinoy and went out to buy timba (bucket), tabo (dipper), palanggana (basin), and guantes (latex gloves). Yes, we all needed to be proactive (a very effective word Mrs. Mack uses on all her workers).

I was washing the dishes with my newly bought guantes when we heard a rush of water from inside the walls. At first, Helen thought it was the sound of "cold water" finally coming to the rescue. However, the water remained hot. After a few minutes, we realized the the water was literally gushing from the walls, to the cabinets, and it eventually flooded the whole kitchen.

Thus, the whole night intended for studying was spent cleaning up the kitchen.

We woke up the next day like this never happened at all. There's a new flood to clean up, no water to use, and it looks like I would have to make daily morning trips to the campus swimming pool.

Excited for February 16 already!

2009-01-25T21:54:00.016-05:00

Why?! Because the Kings Singers will be in Andrews University!!!!

And this is AUP Ambassadors' (China Batch) unfinished Swingles' version: (Rehearsal at the Old Music Building for 50th Anniversay Concert 2007 at the Cultural Center of the Philippines). Incomparable, but, nonetheless good. Lol.

Dilemmas

2009-01-22T23:05:00.003-05:00

I think it has become quite a trend in my life. I thought I was "cursed" to have it, and actually vowed to never do it again. And yet, here I am volunteering myself to do it once again. And again. What I thought to be a curse has proven to be such a blessing in SO very many, unexpected ways. People actually think I am blessed to have it. Sometimes I do. However, there are times that I don't. It seems tho that lately, it's proving to be one of the greatest blessings I could have. Over and over, I am reminded that "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." (Isa. 55:9).

What on earth am I talking about? Well, I'll let you know when it becomes official. :-)
_____________________________

Anyway, I have heard of news that another member of my family was diagnosed with cancer. Please, please, please keep her in your prayers.
_____________________________

I came to the realization that this semester is my last full semester in the MMus Music Education Program. Fall semester 2009 would be spent studying for my Comps, writing my paper, taking an independent class in Music of the Middle Ages and preparing for my Masters Recital. It does look like a lot still, however, it would mean that I would spend less time in the classroom, and more time in the library and the church. And then, I graduate! I can't believe it!

But because I'm the kind of person who wants her ducks perfectly in a row, I am already thinking of what I should do after all that.

Should I go back to the Philippines and work?
Should I pursue an MA in Music Ministry?

However, through prayers, reading of the Word, and many conversations with a lot of godly and trusted people in my life, it seems that my choice does not lie in any of those options stipulated above. Although things are still pretty unclear, and that alot of these should be a matter of prayer, if it does happen, it is going to be a complete turn-around from what people has always expected me to do. I even get shocked at the thought of doing it.

In any case, it is going to be very exciting.
______________________________

But of this I am assured;

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

My Life as of Late

2009-01-22T08:29:00.003-05:00

Monday: Got lost somewhere in Grand Rapids. Cooked food for the whole week!

Tuesday: Dr. Doukhan is out of town again. Frenzied. On-the-go. Frenetic. Freaked out!

Wednesday: Shelved music scores, LPs, and CDs for 3 hours! 3 people in choir rehearsal. Grrr.

Thursday: 120 pages to read in one and a half hour. Excited for organ lesson. More reading tonight.

Let This Mind Be in You

2009-01-18T21:45:00.005-05:00

Yes, not only was the Sabbath a delight, but the best part of yesterday was the Bible Study. Oh, if only we had the means to stay up all night and just read and study the word of God, then we would have done it.

Anyway, today I was reading my weekly journal reading for the Romantic Music class (which turned out to be the wrong one because it had nothing to do at all with Romantic music), and there was a passage in the article a vivid and graphic description of the ecstasy one gets when dancing to techno-music and/or listening to rock n' roll. And you know how one small thought lights up another thought, which leads one to another thought, and to another, and before you know it, you're thinking about things you are not supposed to be thinking about.

"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." Philippians 4:8

However, I admit that it is a struggle to think about those things, especially when the devil knows what exact thoughts to put in there.

"But God already promised the victory to over come such thoughts whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust." 2 Peter 1:4
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Anyway, this could be a helpful link for those struggling with the same things. "Let This Mind Be In You" by Dr. Gerard Damsteegt

God bless everyone! Have a great week!

(Oh, and no class tomorrow! Martin Luther King Jr. Day! Safe travels tho as I go to Grand Rapids.)

Snow Day!

2009-01-16T01:35:00.011-05:00

For the first time ever since I came here to Andrews U, classes were cancelled due to heavy snow! Here are some shots I took of AU Campus from Dr. Doukhan's window during lunch break and on the way home aboard Mrs. Mack's car. (It didn't mean that my work for the day cancelled, too.)

And honestly, I had to laugh when my friend Jisun called me on the phone earlier today and exclaimed, "Just look at the snow! Man, Michigan is not for single people!"

Good Times...

2009-01-01T22:09:00.015-05:00

“Why do good times have to come to an end?” I ask myself on board the plane on the way to Toronto. Having nothing to do on the six-hour long flight, I collected my thoughts on what I should write in this blog. I have just gone through three weeks of wonderful experiences with friends, and looking forward to an equally awesome reunion with family in Canada. Thoughts fly high in whirlwind fashion as I sigh…and sigh again at how time flew by so fast for me.

I still recall how I would animatedly tell Nina, my workmate at the Music Materials Center, how excited I am for Christmas break, and in turn enumerate to her the places I would go to, the things I would do, and the people I would meet. She was envious. I was ecstatic. Helen and Eva, my housemates, are equal witnesses to how I want the days to rush by quickly so that I could get out of Berrien Springs and go on my “holiday trip”. It has indeed become a household phrase, “I can’t wait for Christmas break because…yada, yada, yada.” I had everything to look forward to, and yet in a snap, I’m now looking backward and recalling what has happened.

Part 1: December 13-17, Roadtrip to San Jose, California from Berrien Springs, Michigan with the Decenas (Kuya Allen, Ate Jelene, AJ) and Eva.

Leaving the wicked snowy town of Berrien Springs a couple hours after Sabbath sunset, we say our prayers and kissed the snow away as we travel to San Jose. We have said our goodbyes, packed the little car to the fullest, and squeezed in our small Asian butts to fill in every corner of the car. How we fit? I don’t know. How we managed? I don’t know. All I know is that we were all Filipinos and that should really explain everything.

Oklahoma City—Eva was driving, and the Decenas are sleeping. Just a quick snapshot of where we got lost.

More shots in Oklahoma

And then we found ourselves in Texas after a few hours:

Then to New Mexico and Arizona. I didn’t have pictures of New Mexico since I was busy…sleeping. Nevertheless, Ate Jelene woke me up to at least take a shot of the state border. Some shots were also taken at the Grand Canyon. It was too foggy to see everything in its grandeur. Still, I was taken aback by the “little” piece of it that I saw.

Then Nevada. We stopped by Hoover Dam to take quick shots before we spend the rest of the night in Las Vegas. I don’t think I have a lot of pictures in Las Vegas because I appointed myself to be Eva’s personal photographer.

-------
(After four months and 3 weeks)

I don't know why I'm even bothering to post this. It's been a long time since this trip happened. However, I would like to give a quick overview of the whole trip and a list of memories that I would like to look back to:

So after Las Vegas, we finally headed to San Francisco to attend GYC 2008: For This Purpose. Then I headed to Arizona with Ji Sun Kim, a Korean girl I met in Andrews randomly, but we found ourselves stuck together during the GYC session due to several weird circumstances; and Malcolm Douglas, another student I met randomly in Berrien Springs; and a group of Swedish kids Malcolm invited. Before we finally get to Arizona, we had to make some detours and I was very happy to reunite with several of my closest friends in the AUP Ambassadors. We had a mini concert of sorts and it was really good to reminisce "those times" when all we lived for was singing while studying on the sides--and certainly NOT vice versa.

I basically spent a good chunk of time in Arizona, chilling with a group of people that I met and talked with either for the first time, or with Malcolm's case, someone who I talked to a lot previously before this trip, but not a lot during this time.

Finally, I needed to go and visit my family in Toronto before going back to Michigan. So off I flew hours before New Year's Eve.

I should say that had I written this post right after the events, there would have been more details that I would be pressured to NOT write. However, it doesn't mean that alot of the details escaped me because of the passing of time. I would like to say tho that as I look back at it now, the events that transpired during this trip became an impetus for what I am and the way I think right now.

Anyway, here are some of my favorite memories and lessons regarding the trip:

Being to GYC for the first time and being blessed with the sermons and lectures of the guest speakers. It also gave me the inspiration to do more for God and be someone who would be willing to be different person from what the world expects me to be. However, listening to Audioverse weeks after GYC, I realized that I went to the wrong lecture series. At least I think, I did. Had I gone to the Holiness lecture by Alan Parker, I'm sure the events that transpired after that would have been radically different. But God really intended me to be in a different place I guess, because a very great lesson had to be learned.
Being good friends with Ji Sun. I never imagined that I would share a closeness with her, of all people. But this woman has wisdom, and I thank God, despite the weirdness of the situation, that we have become good friends!
Being inspired from the way the Swedish kids were hungering and thirsting for the Scriptures. It is because of their example that I have my own set of Scripture cards to memorize while I shelve books and music recording in the library.
Having too much food from my relatives that I was actually able to feed people I don't know.
Sharing with my Amba friends the things I learned from Bible studies.
Being in the car for almost everyday. Especially the part when I travelled with Kuya Allen, Ate Jelene, AJ, and Eva.
Being with family in Toronto at such a right time.

I have a lot more to thank God for especially because a great "price" was paid, and a painful lesson was learned. While it may not be the time for a "love" relationship to bloom at this specific time of the year, the wilting away of the feelings was the best answer God had given. I thank God because He gives for our own good, and takes it away for the very same reason. In my case, it was a friendship that had to be sacrificed.

However, God does make things beautiful in His time. One has the choice then if he/she wants to allow God to go things in His own time and way or not.

My Utmost for His Highest

2008-11-20T09:21:00.002-05:00

"What has been like water from the wall of Bethlehem to you recently? Love, friendship, spiritual blessing? Then at the peril of your soul you take it to satisfy yourself. If you do, you cannot pour it out before the Lord. How am I to pour out spiritual gifts, or natural friendships, or love? How can I give them to the Lord? In one way only--in the determination of the mind, and that takes about two seconds. If I hold spiritual blessings or friendship for myself they will corrupt me, no matter how beautiful they are. I have to pour them out before the Lord, give them to Him in my mind, though it looks as if I am wasting them, even as David poured the water out on the sand, to be instantly sucked up."

-Oswald Chambers

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Yeah, quoting says it all, doesn't it?!

What Shall I Give My Love?

2008-11-20T09:06:00.003-05:00

"I asked the heaven of stars
What I should give my love---
It answered me with silence,
Silence above.

I asked the darkened sea
Down where the fishes go--
It answered me with silence,
Silence below.

Oh, I could give him weeping,
Or I could give him a song--
But how can I give silence
My whole life long?"

-Sara Teasdale

Growing Pains

2008-11-19T14:52:00.006-05:00

Ingrid Santamaria, a Filipino pianist, once wrote that learning music can be likened into the four seasons. I don't remember the exact words she wrote, but I recall reading it, and putting down the article with much sensitivity to how I practice, how I play, and how learning a piece can also relate with how we view life in general. She also said that one cannot force a piece to be learned right away. Like a seed, it takes time to grow, nurtured, until it fully blooms. When it has reached it's glorious height of musical sensitivity and expression, there comes a time when one can put it away. Let it fall. Let it rest. Miraculously, when one plays a piece from it's rest, it becomes even more beautiful than the first time it was performed.

True, one cannot deny the mystery of letting something be. Having experienced my first four seasons recently, I just can't help but have my own epiphanies of some sort about growing and letting things settle at it's natural pace.

In walking with the Saviour, there is always that anxious thought that I might not be really growing in grace. But I have learned that these thoughts can and must be replaced instead by doing every duty that presents itself, by carrying the burden of souls in my heart, and by conceiving every means to seek and save the lost.

How does one do it?

Be kind.
Be courteous.
Be forgiving.
Speak in humility of the blessed hope.
Talk of the love of Jesus.
Tell of His goodness, His mercy, and His righteousness.

Every thought of worry or fear of not growing should be banished and brought to Him. The plant does not worry whether it grows or not. Simply, it grows under the supervision of God.

The Makings of a Teacherwannabe

2008-10-19T23:20:00.004-04:00

I am truly in my grad assistant mode when I am standing in front of the students, in the classroom, and the one giving the lecture. Surprisingly, standing before an audience to teach or give a presentation is much more satisfying than performing. Such a shame for a musician to admit, but what can I say, but that I love teaching!

Tomorrow, I get to do that again. Although, I am thankful that Dr. Doukhan is not getting sick lately, I would say I kinda miss stressing out over a chapter in music history and presenting it in class.

I have dreamed of becoming a teacher ever since I could remember. I probably owe that inclination to my grandfather who babysat me while he was still strong, and while I was too young to go to school yet old enough to be left behind at someone else's house.

Tatay, as we all grandkids fondly call him, is one of the most interesting characters in all of the "ancient" Adaps. Well, I am saying that with much bias because, as far as I know, while there are probably a hundred other Adaps, Tatay is the one I got really well acquainted with.

Until now, I could vividly capture it in my head the many mornings I would see him seated on a chair, by the door, reading his Bible. The long morning hours would stretch, and I have probably played all the variations of hopscotch, playhouse, and other games my creative mind invented by the yard. While he sat there. With the Bible in one hand, and a vintage magnifying glass in the other.

Many times, I would hear him reading aloud from the Revelation. He might have thought I was just that little girl playing hopscotch but I was actually listening to him say the verses aloud. Then again, he might be reading aloud so I that I would hear it...I don't know. I even remember wanting to ask him why the dragon got mad with the woman. But Ia never got around to asking it because I would forget it by the time he finished his daily Bible reading.

The afternoon would be my favorite time of day because that meant he would tell me Bible stories. And so the old man takes me through desserts, mountains, kings, prophets, and other wonderful adventures in the Bible. But Joseph would probably be the most requested story. Sometimes, these stories are meant for me to sleep. But the way he weaves the story would just make me stay awake and push him for more until he would give up and say--"If you don't want to sleep, then I will."

But Tatay was so smart that finally he was able to tell a story and make me sleep right after. One time, he told me about Moses and the Israelites crossing the Red Sea. While the story itself was exciting, he would painstakingly go through every single detail that it would put me to sleep. Trying to resist it, I would say, "Can we just fast forward to where all of them have crossed the Red Sea already? What happened next?" And he would say, "Don't you want to wait until all the cows have crossed already? Now there are 12 cows waiting for their turn to cross. One cow has three black spots..." And then he loses me at that. It was just the perfect sleeping pill.

Eventually, I went to school and fell in love with my grade one teacher. I wanted to be just like her and copied her hairstyle and everything else I could copy. Although there were several teachers that discouraged my desire, those experiences were so trivial that I only recall challenging myself with words like--"When I become a teacher, I will not be like him/her."

However, even though there is a desire, that doesn't necessarily mean that I got it made. In fact, my very first real teaching job was such a big failure that everybody in the class got an F except one, and I get reprimanded by many teachers in the department, and was accused of liking the the only one guy who got the A. Puh-lease!!!

Yep. It was that messed up.

But the dream doesn't wane. I am more inclined than ever. And tomorrow, I will stand again and face them.

Thoughts On Reformation

2008-10-08T09:08:00.009-04:00

A friend recently headlined his Facebook profile that he is going through a serious reformation in his life. And I ask myself, How does one get "reformed"? And what happens to someone who undergoes a serious reformation? I am sure that he is pertaining to a spiritual kind of reformation, and the question just stuck to me for the whole day...

Back home, there used to be three categories of Seventh Day Adventists. At least, that is how one "holier-than-the-other" group would always say. There are Black-Sheep Adventists who claim they are Adventists but do all sorts of things an SDA would not (or should not) be caught doing. Then there are the Pharisaic Adventists who does all the lip service and goes through all the motions of Adventist-style propriety, and there are the Reformed Adventists who are often looked down or frowned upon by the two previous groups. They are the radicals who eat raw foods, wear long skirts everyday, and live like hobbits in the mountain. At least that's how they would act like. They usually cause the unnecessary stir within the church, then when their opinions are not accepted, they would go out of the church, and the next thing you know they have their own church, better than the SDAs, or as they would claim it to be. I grew up knowing people from each of these categories, as well as people who skipped from one group to the other. My doctor, after being in the Adventist faith for many years became a "reform" and went out of the church. And I don't get it. So when someone mentions reformation in one's life, I just have to flex my mind a little bit on how much meaning there really is to it.

Of course, the above description of "reform" is being radically literal. In the course of time, as I mature and I come across people who sincerely share with me their testimonies of how God "changed" aka "reformed" their lives, my definition of the word begins to make more sense. One reads the Great Controversy and will see several chapters on reformation---not just in history, but that this kind of reformation can and should be personal, as well.

So--what really is a reformation? If Jesus died on the cross already aren't we cleansed from sin? Then what need is there to reform? Is it because His death on the cross was not enough???

My housemate Helen, and I had a very interesting conversation about it this morning. After singing several hymns about heaven, I told her that I want Jesus to come soon. And she said---"Well, are you saying that because you are fed up with your life?" And I'm like, "That's part of the reason. But I really do want Him to come soon because I want to see Him." She paused thoughtfully before reacting to my statement. Finally, she said, "Do you think you are ready if He comes, not soon, but right now?" "I think, I'm not." "Wrong answer, Irene. If you really want Him to come soon, every moment of your life should find you ready. That's where reformation comes in. It is a daily, moment by moment process as you let God reveal His ways in your life---and you, on the other hand, walk exactly on that path."

"Sin must no longer rule in your mortal bodies, so that you obey the desires of your natural self. Nor must you surrender any part of yourselves to sin to be used for wicked purposes. Instead, give yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life, and surrender your whole being to Him. to be used for righteous purposes. Sin must not be your master; for you do not live under law but under God's grace." -From Romans 6; T.E.V.

This Week's Quotable Quotes to Keep!

2008-10-05T23:12:00.003-04:00

The SAMSON chapter of Patriarchs and Prophets leaves two strong quotes for me to ponder and keep for the rest of the week---and for as long as I need it.

"Many mistake strong passions for a strong character, but the truth is that he who is mastered by his passions is a weak man. The real greatness of the man is measured by the power of the feelings that he controls, not by those that control him."

"The very ones whom God purposes to use as His instruments for a special work, Satan employs his utmost power to lead astray. He attacks us at out weak points, working through defects in the character to gain control of the whole man; and he knows that if these defects are cherished, he will succeed. But none need be overcome. Man is not left alone to conquer the power of evil by his own feeble efforts. Help is at hand and will be given to every soul who really desires it."

May this week find me a conqueror of my weaknesses through the power of Jesus Christ.

God's Perfect Strength

2008-10-01T20:58:00.003-04:00

Although classes have been in session for a month, I feel very inadequate and weak to face life's daily challenges. So many things have distracted me from my focus that almost all my classes are suffering. From coordinating a choir's local tour, to keeping jobs, to dealing with difficult people, to figuring out where to get money, and to finally moving out of the house. Add to that classes that enhance my weakest spots. I simply find myself overcome with a load too heavy for me to bear. Try as I might to hide it, I cannot. Immediate professors frequently ask me how I feel and how I'm doing, classmates would always ask me the question almost on a daily basis--"What's happening with you, Irene? Why are you slacking off? This is not you."

As I bike home from school, too weary to even look at the beautiful sunset that always catch my gaze on my better moods, I find myself asking the question..."What on earth am I really doing here in Berrien Springs, anyway?" And more often than I intend to, the question looms before with a more depressing effect every time I think about it.

Yet somehow I have the feeling that I'm asking the wrong question. The question I posed therefore could have several variants:

"What should I do here in Berrien Springs?"
"What can I do here in Berrien Springs?"
"What has God done for me here in Berrien Springs?"
"What have I done for God here in Berrien Springs?"
"What should I be doing for God here in Berrien Springs?"

And it goes on.

But God never fails me. The passages I read this morning are words of strength just when I needed them most. I would like to share some of the ones that directly applies to my life right NOW.

"God does not always choose for His work men of the greatest talents, but He selects those whom He can best use...The Lord can work most effectually through those who are most sensible of their own insufficiency and who will rely upon Him as their leader and source of strength. He will make them strong by uniting their weakness to His might, and wise by connecting their ignorance with His wisdom."

"...in choosing the instruments for His work, the Lord passes by those whom the world honors as great, talented, and brilliant."

"The most complete system that men have ever devised, apart from the power and wisdom of God, will prove a failure, while the most unpromising methods will succeed when divinely appointed and entered upon with humility and faith. Trust in God and obedience to His will are as essential to the Christian in the spiritual warfare as to Gideon and Joshua in their battles with the Canaanites."

"He is just as willing to work with efforts of His people now and to accomplish great things through weak instrumentalities. All heaven awaits our demand upon its wisdom and strength. God is 'able do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think.' Eph. 3:20"

(Patriarchs and Prophets, Chapter 53)

May God find me useful in my weakness for He alone is my Strength.

Why Give Up?

2008-09-06T18:37:00.000-04:00

There comes a time in one’s life when something precious needs to be given up. And looking back at mine, I recall that I have had those instances when many things in my life needed to be surrendered to Him. Sure, it was painful, but the pain that I thought would never go away seem now like a distant memory.

However, as much as one has moved on, there is always that bend in life’s road that would require one to give up something again. Give them all to Jesus…and He will turn your sorrow into gold. But the process of giving things up is never easy. God doesn’t ask for what we are ready to throw away. Instead He asks for the precious things that the heart has made an idol over. Also I realize that I have not given Him all, hence, a giving up process is required of me every now and then.

I was thinking about all these, and praying at the same time that God would show me a clear picture of things. Here is what He provided me:

A refining, purifying process is going on among the people of God, and the Lord of hosts has set His hand to this work. This process is most trying to the soul, but it is necessary in order that defilement may be removed. Trials are essential in order that we may be brought close to our heavenly Father, in submission to His will, that we may offer unto the Lord an offering in righteousness. . . . The Lord brings His children over the same ground again and again, increasing the pressure until perfect humility fills the mind, and the character is transformed; then they are victorious over self, and in harmony with Christ and the Spirit of heaven. The purification of God's people cannot be accomplished without suffering. . . . He passes us from one fire to another, testing our true worth. True grace is willing to be tried. If we are loath to be searched by the Lord, our condition is one of peril. . . .

It is in mercy that the Lord reveals to men their hidden defects. He would have them critically examine the complicated emotions and motives of their own hearts, and detect that which is wrong, and modify their dispositions and refine their manners. God would have His servants become acquainted with their own hearts. In order to bring to them a true knowledge of their condition, He permits the fire of affliction to assail them, so that they may be purified. The trials of life are God's workmen to remove the impurities, infirmities, and roughness from our characters, and fit them for the society of pure, heavenly angels in glory. . . . The fire will not consume us, but only remove the dross, and we shall come forth seven times purified, bearing the impress of the Divine.

Our sorrows do not spring out of the ground. In every affliction God has a purpose to work out for our good. Every blow that destroys an idol, every providence that weakens our hold upon earth and fastens our affections more firmly upon God, is a blessing. The pruning may be painful for a time, but afterward it "yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness." We should receive with gratitude whatever will quicken the conscience, elevate the thoughts, and ennoble the life. The fruitless branches are cut off and cast into the fire. Let us be thankful that through painful pruning we may retain a connection with the living Vine; for if we suffer with Christ, we shall also reign with Him. The very trial that taxes our faith the most severely and makes it seem as though God had forsaken us is to lead us more closely to Him, that we may lay all our burdens at the feet of Christ and experience the peace which He will give us in exchange. . . . God loves and cares for the feeblest of His creatures, and we cannot dishonor Him more than by doubting His love to us. O let us cultivate that living faith that will trust Him in the hour of darkness and trial! EG White, My Life Today (1952), p.92.

What does God want to take from me?

…I will let Him take my life that it may be consecrated to Him.
…I will let Him take my will for it was really never mine.
…I will let Him take my heart, it is His alone, His royal throne.
…I will let Him take my love, at His feet its treasure store.
…I will let Him take myself, and will let myself be, ever, only, ALL for Thee.

Happy Birthday, Malcolm!

2008-08-28T22:20:00.000-04:00

A good friend of mine is celebrating his birthday today. Although he prides himself for being young, he actually looks older than most people older than him, aka me. LOL! Hmmmm. So what does one say about someone's birthday anyway aside from the obvious and cliche? *Shrugs* I don't know either. Oh, well. Here's to you, Malcolm, and I hope you are having a great time getting to be as old as you really look. ;-)))

Disabled

2008-08-27T19:29:00.000-04:00

So, I have finally disabled my Facebook account, but not on purpose. Although I had every intention to, I keep changing my mind and keep finding reasons that having a Facebook account is beneficial. Hence the postponement, but not a total cancellation of the idea.

However, today, when I tried accessing it, I found out that I can never get into my account anymore. I tried all the possible passwords I have but to no avail.

So Facebook friends, it's been great getting to know you all, and reconnecting with you (actually, stalking you would be a more appropriate use of term...LOL). It's not goodbye tho, because I can still read wall posts, inbox messages, and photo comments. Also if you really want to reach me you can always email me. The address I believe is still in the Info Box of my Facebook account. I write this because I know it will be posted on my Facebook Notes, although it has 25% chance of getting read at all.

There is one regret tho because I plan to post something for someone "special". Oh well, there's always Youtube. :-)

So do you suggest that I get a new Facebook account? Nah, I don't think so. :-)

I plan to spend time WISELY! ;-)